Your city is planning to develop new sports complex. The city has sent out an opinion survey to see what residents would like to have built in that area. Athletic tracks and supports Complex: Sports complex will mainly provide facilities to Athletes.

It goes without saying that our
phisical
Correct your spelling
physical
health is needed to be enhanced regularly. That's why my choice includes the construction of different athletic gizmos inside the complex
instead
of a place for
games
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game
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observing
Replace the word
observation
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.
Moreover
, I am capable
to develop
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of developing
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this
idea
describing
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by describing
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pros
Correct article usage
the pros
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and cons. Speaking of benefits, I can mention the next:
Firstly
, having a modern fitness centre will give city
dvellers
Correct your spelling
dwellers
oportunity
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opportunity
to be more sporty. It certainly increases the protection against various
deseases
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diseases
,
injuries
Correct word choice
and injuries
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, and
contribute
Correct subject-verb agreement
contributes
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greatly to our immune system.
For instance
, I haven't had any serious illnesses since I
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
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started visiting the gym.
Secondly
, spending time in
this
complex could become a significant entertainment for the whole family. My wife and I love training together every other day with fun. On the other
hands
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hand
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, sports fans may be a little bit upset about the absence of a
brand new
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brand-new
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baseball ground. I absolutely agree that watching
favourite
Correct pronoun usage
my favourite
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elite sportsmen
in
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apply
show examples
live is
amazing
Add an article
an amazing
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activity. But having fun obviously looks less
usefull
Correct your spelling
useful
in comparison with regular athletics sessions.
To sum up
, everyone is able to take care
about
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of
show examples
the
Change the word
their
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mental and physical well-being using
fitness
Correct article usage
a fitness
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inventory. And it's utterly fantastic to have it right next to your home.
This
is the reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
my standing with the building up of a place for sporting
Submitted by alex.kras4444 on

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task response
While the essay attempts to discuss the issue, the response seems only partially on topic and occasionally drifts away. The task requires a wider exploration of residents' opinions regarding a sports complex, not just personal views.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure all paragraphs clearly contribute to the overall argument or explanation. The advantage-disadvantage structure is logical but requires clearer transitions and stronger topic sentences to better connect ideas.
task achievement
In writing task 2, you must provide your opinion, but also explore a broader range of issues related to the topic. It's important to balance your position with the consideration of alternative views or potential disadvantages.
accuracy
Check for grammatical errors and spelling mistakes, as several were found. It's important to proofread your essay to improve its clarity and overall quality.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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