Some people think that the government should provide unemployed people with a free mobile phone and free access to the internet to help them find jobs. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience. Write at least 250 words.

Public's
Correct article usage
The public's
show examples
opinion about
to provide
Change the verb form
providing
show examples
jobless humans with
phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
show examples
and free access to the internet in order to find
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
by
Change preposition
in
show examples
government
should be agreed
or
Change preposition
upon or
show examples
disagreed. I think that
this
encourage
Replace the word
encouragement
show examples
should be allowed. Because
,
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apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
all of
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
people
also
Add a missing verb
are also
show examples
civils of
country
Correct article usage
the country
show examples
and they can have edges and liberty as same as other
people
. The vast majority may claim that
this
isn't
government's
Correct article usage
the government's
show examples
priority.
However
,
this
writing
disagree
Change the verb form
disagrees
show examples
with
these
Correct determiner usage
this
show examples
report. In my own
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
show examples
all
people
have
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
individual skill which is very
diffirent
Correct your spelling
different
to
campare
Correct your spelling
compared
with
anothers
Correct your spelling
others
. Some
people
might have common perspectives,
meanwhile
Add a comma
meanwhile,
show examples
another one can express their
talant
Correct your spelling
talent
talents
very well. With
this
statement
Add a comma
statement,
show examples
we can
understood
Change the verb form
understand
show examples
that
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
show examples
of unemployed
people
have their individual
way
Fix the agreement mistake
ways
show examples
that
even
Rephrase
apply
show examples
they
also
Rephrase
apply
show examples
might
didn't
Verb problem
not
show examples
know.
Furthermore
,
people
's interaction with their true work may lead
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
or
country
's economy to a new level. All of
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
claims can't be
done
Verb problem
made
show examples
without finding,
communication
Replace the word
communicating
show examples
or interacting with particular
people
. The best way to advertise yourself or
finding
Wrong verb form
find
show examples
out new jobs
located
Verb problem
is
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the internet. All
people
have a second chance to change. In conclusion, as I mentioned previously argue that
government
should maintain
people
's
need
Fix the agreement mistake
needs
show examples
. In fact
that
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
government
's first priority is
safety
Correct article usage
the safety
show examples
, liberty and
economically
Change the word
economic
show examples
sustainability of their
country
's dwellers, they must help
like
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
to improve their
country
.
Submitted by aikumarbekarys on

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coherence cohesion
Make sure your essay has a clear structure with distinct introduction, body, and conclusion paragraphs. The introduction should present the topic and your position clearly, followed by body paragraphs that support your viewpoint with relevant examples, and concluding with a coherent summary.
coherence cohesion
Develop your main points with specific examples and explanations. Your essay should have a logical flow of ideas and clearly show how each point relates to your overall argument.
task achievement
Address all parts of the task. Make sure your response fully answers the question, and that you provide a balanced argument if the task requires it. Include examples that are relevant and support your points effectively.
task achievement
Although language is not being explicitly assessed here, it's important to be aware of the clarity of your ideas and the accuracy of your language use. Ambiguity or incorrect use of English can detract from the overall quality of your response.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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