IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The two diagrams below describe changes to a museum's floor plan between 2008 and 2012.

The two diagrams below describe changes to a museum's floor plan between 2008 and 2012.
#two #diagrams #changes #museum #floor #plan
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The two maps illustrate some developments to a museum's sketch
plan
Use synonyms
 in the
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
2008 to 2012. In
overwiew
Correct your spelling
overview
, there were great improvements between
Change the article
the year
show examples
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
 2008 and 2012,
this
Linking Words
 is clearly
showed
Change the form of the verb
shown
show examples
 with fewer
number of
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
buildings compared to many in a period of four years.
To begin
Linking Words
 with,
terrace
Correct article usage
a terrace
show examples
 and restaurant was added to the
plan
Use synonyms
, since in 2008 there
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
not
Correct your spelling
no
show examples
such
Linking Words
 thing,
therefore
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 is clear that
modificatins
Correct your spelling
modifications
 were
done
Verb problem
made
show examples
.Another development was experienced in 2012,
this
Linking Words
 is when a lift was introduced to make it easier to reach the fourth floor.In 2008, there was only
1st
Correct article usage
a 1st
show examples
 and 2nd floor, so
to use
Change the verb form
using
show examples
elevator
Correct article usage
the elevator
show examples
 was not
neccessary
Correct your spelling
necessary
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
Reception
Correct article usage
the Reception
show examples
 and Cloak Room became a single room
inorder
Correct your spelling
in order
show examples
 to create a space for
children's
Correct article usage
a children's
show examples
 playground,
as a result
Linking Words
 of
this
Linking Words
, in 2012 a high-rise
plan
Use synonyms
 was formed.
Lastly
Linking Words
,
Self-service
Add an article
the Self-service
show examples
 cafe
Linking Words
also
Add a missing verb
was also
show examples
attouched
Correct your spelling
attached
 to the floor
plan
Use synonyms
,
this
Linking Words
 was done to avoid dry mouth when people
visted
Correct your spelling
visited
 the museum and other buildings
such
Linking Words
 as
Gallery
Correct article usage
the Gallery
show examples
 and
remain
Wrong verb form
remained
show examples
 unchanged.
Submitted by cajaah93 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "such".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words plan with synonyms.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Floor plan
  • Renovation
  • Expansion
  • Spatial distribution
  • Accessibility
  • Visitor experience
  • Exhibit
  • Gallery
  • Interactive displays
  • Historical artifacts
  • Educational facilities
  • Visitor amenities
  • Foot traffic
  • Layout alteration
  • Modernize
  • Gift shop
  • Cafeteria
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