Some people think that an international car-free day is an effective way to reduce air pollution. Others think there are more effective ways to do this. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion

Nowadays, air pollution has become a great concern as it is increasing global warming . A few masses suggest that a care-free day should be kept on a global level to decrease air damage,
while
others believe that there are some better alternative measures available to tackle
this
issue. In
this
essay, I will discuss both views in detail and provide supporting examples to prove the latter statement takes precedence.
To begin
with, it is obvious that on an international car-free day, the citizens will not take their personal cars out on the roads, which automatically will result in fewer numbers of vehicles in the city. And the lesser the card on the road lesser the emission of toxic gases into the environment.
However
,
this
idea is illogical because it will create difficulties for people in an emergency to go out in their cars.
Also
, the public transportations may get overcrowded
as a consequence
is
this
approach.
On the other hand
, there are some more effective solutions to
this
phenomenon
such
as carpooling.
In other words
, a group of 4-5 people who have a similar destination can travel together in a single vehicle.
This
way, air pollution can be limited to some extent.
Furthermore
, another important step that can be taken by the ministry is to put some restrictions on the industries that discharge harmful gases into nature.
For example
, authorities can charge fines to those factories that release
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
carbon dioxide more than the normal limit.
According to
me, the idea of the international no-car day is absurd and there are plenty of other solutions to save
Correct article usage
the
show examples
atmosphere quality. These include the car-sharing trend and strict regulations by the government.
Submitted by jeelthakkar9 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction
Ensure that your introduction sets the context of the topic effectively and clearly outlines your scope for discussion. In this essay, the introduction was unclear, lacking a definitive stance or overview of the points to be discussed, which is essential for a strong introduction.
Logical Structure
Work on the logical flow of your essay by improving transitions between ideas. Ideas should effectively link together so that the reader can easily follow your argument. This essay showed some attempt at cohesion, but ideas appeared disjointed at times.
Supported Main Points
Provide clear topic sentences for each paragraph to establish the main point, followed by supporting ideas and relevant examples. While there were some examples provided, the support for the main points could be further developed for a more convincing argument.
Complete Response
Address the task directly, making sure to discuss both views presented in the prompt as well as your own opinion. The essay should cover all parts of the task with a balance between both views and a clear personal stance, with this essay showing attempts but lacking in balanced coverage and clear expression of personal opinion.
Clear Comprehensive Ideas
Develop comprehensive ideas by exploring the context and depth of the topic. Your essay should reflect a clear understanding and should be elaborated with enough detail to show that complexity has been considered. Your ideas were on the right track but could have been explained more thoroughly.
Relevant Specific Examples
Always aim to include specific examples that are directly relevant to the main ideas and demonstrate a real-world application of the concepts being discussed. While your essay had some examples, including more detailed and direct examples could make your argument stronger and more persuasive.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • sustainability
  • emissions standards
  • renewable energy
  • environmentally friendly
  • public transportation
  • pedestrian zones
  • commuter behavior
  • awareness
  • incentives
  • air pollution
What to do next:
Look at other essays: