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In many countries, women are allowed to take maternity leave from their jobs during the first year after the birth of their baby. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#countries #women #maternity #jobs #first #year #birth #baby #outweigh
In today's era, working women are increasing more and more in order to help their husbands with life expenses. Recently, most sectors nowadays offer
to deliver
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apply
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mothers a maternity leave which lasts up to a year. In
this
 essay, I am going to shed some light on the advantages and disadvantages of giving maternity leave for a year.
To begin
 with, the advantage of having a maternal leave as a working mother is taking good care of the baby. Newborns always need some sort of long-term care to grow up in a healthy pattern.
In addition
 to that, mothers
also
 need some kind of long-term rest, because giving birth is a strenuous biological procedure and needs some time to recover.
Also
, mothers need some type of financial support to help themselves and their
baby
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babies
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.
on the other hand
, some
companies
 do not employ young women, and that's
due to
 the fact that
such
companies
 look at these employees as a burden if they get pregnant and are ready to deliver.
For instance
, there is a recent study that was done by Harvard University stating that
companies
 spend about 6 billion dollars on maternity leave that lasts about a year, and many
companies
 see
this
 as a financial loss.
On the contrary
, these employers can make working from home possible for these women.
This
 can increase the productivity of the organization, and cut transportation costs. In conclusion, there is a number of advantages of having maternal leave which
includes
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include
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, taking care of the baby and the woman, and helping the mother to recover. Other disadvantages include
,
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 high expenses to the company with no productivity.
Submitted by osama2010b on

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Task Achievement
For Task Achievement, ensure all parts of the prompt are fully addressed. Your essay mentioned some advantages and disadvantages, but did not explicitly address whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. Expand the comparison to directly respond to the question.
Coherence and Cohesion
To enhance Coherence and Cohesion, structure your essay in a clear, logical manner. Use appropriate paragraphing and linking words to better connect your ideas. Some points were mentioned abruptly without fully explaining how they relate to the main argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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