Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sport facilities. Others, however, that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
One of the discussed
issues
nowadays is people's health. Some believe that it will
be better if governments required more Wrong verb form
would
sports
facilities
. Meanwhile, some do not think it is enough to solve this
problem by buildings. This
essay will analyse both views and express my opinion.
On the one hand, to keep fit and be healthier individuals need to do sports
. In that case, sports
facilities
are the best option. Mostly who have weak
Add an article
a weak
body
, they are hardly treated by illnesses. Fix the agreement mistake
Exercise
Exercises
will Fix the agreement mistake
Exercise
do
your Verb problem
make
body
and organism stronger. It will help to avoid a lot of issues
that cause a weak body
. For example
, to recover from a cold, you need to sweat. Most doctors advicing
Correct your spelling
advise
do
exercises or going to Wrong verb form
doing
sports
buildings to be cured.
On the other hand
, not only less
exercises lead to Change the quantifier
fewer
issues
of
Change preposition
for
public
Add an article
the public
a public
organism
Fix the agreement mistake
organisms
,
Add the word(s)
, but
also
we have other problems like air polutions
from vehicles and factories. One of the most unhealthy Correct your spelling
pollution
pollutions
gas
for Fix the agreement mistake
gases
poeple
Correct your spelling
people
Add a missing verb
is cause
cause
Replace the word
caused
from
Change preposition
by
this
two things. Correct determiner usage
these
This
gas not only cover
our society, Correct subject-verb agreement
covers
they
Correct pronoun usage
it
cover
all planet and Correct subject-verb agreement
covers
had
Wrong verb form
has
Correct article usage
the wrost
wrost
impact on nature. If Correct your spelling
worst
goverments
will Correct your spelling
governments
government
take
attention only Verb problem
pay
for
Change preposition
to
sports
building
, not Fix the agreement mistake
buildings
for
Change preposition
to
another aspects
, it will not matter how Replace the adjective
another aspect
other aspects
more
individuals will train their Correct quantifier usage
many
body
, they can not avoid Fix the agreement mistake
bodies
from
illnesses that cause Change preposition
apply
polutions
.
Correct your spelling
pollution
pollutions
solutions
To sum up
, all mentioned , I come to conclusion
that Add an article
the conclusion
sports
facilities
are needed and they are
help people keep Unnecessary verb
apply
health
, but we Replace the word
healthy
also
must not forget about another problem. Therefore
, currently, we must solve issues
bigger than the fewer sports
facilities
.Such
as,
Remove the comma
apply
pollutions
.Fix the agreement mistake
pollution
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coherence cohesion
Ensure your essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. The introduction should set out the argument, the body should support this with coherent points, and the conclusion should summarize your discussion and opinion.
coherence cohesion
Improve logical connections between ideas. Transitional phrases and clear topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph can help with the flow of your argument.
coherence cohesion
Develop main points more thoroughly. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea and supporting details to build a compelling argument.
task achievement
Address all parts of the task. Make sure to discuss both viewpoints as well as give your own opinion clearly and extensively.
task achievement
Clarify and expand on your ideas to provide a more in-depth discussion of the topic. Use more complex sentence structures and precise vocabulary to explain your points clearly.
task achievement
Include relevant, specific examples to strengthen your argument. These examples should be detailed and directly related to the topic being discussed.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.