students should spend timeworking before beginning their university studies. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#students #university #studies

At present,

work-experience

Correct your spelling

work experience

show examples

plays a crucial role in

workforce

Add an article

the workforce

show examples

However

wether

Correct your spelling

whether

show examples

students

contribute their

time

work

before starting

university

studies

is constantly

debate

Wrong verb form

debated

show examples

This

eassy

Correct your spelling

essay

easy

will explore the merits and

demertis

Correct your spelling

demerits

, and

the

Change preposition

in the

show examples

end, I will stand my

opnion

Correct your spelling

opinion

. I agree

the

Change preposition

with the

show examples

statement that

students

spend

time

too much

time

timeworking

Correct your spelling

time working

might

effect

Correct your spelling

affect

show examples

their

performence

Correct your spelling

performance

university

studies

comparing

Wrong verb form

compared

show examples

with those who do not

work

Correct your spelling

show examples

advance. Because they contribute

time

to working rather than

prestuding

Correct your spelling

presiding

university

's courses.

In addition

, spending too much

time

on working might impose their

psycologic

Correct your spelling

psychological

psychologic

stress. Despite

Change preposition

apply

show examples

these reasons, I believe that

timeworing

Correct your spelling

timeworn

before

begining

Correct your spelling

beginning

their

university's

Change noun form

university

show examples

studies

would provide some benefits for these

students

Firstly

, they can adapt to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society in advance,

such

as how to interact with

colleages propertly

Correct your spelling

colleagues properly

Secondly

timeworking

Correct your spelling

time working

will

fulfill

Change the spelling

fulfil

show examples

their life and

work

experience, because they can learn

someting

Correct your spelling

something

what

Correct word choice

that

show examples

would not be

taugt

Correct your spelling

taught

in school. For

examplem

Correct your spelling

example

, they can

enhence

Correct your spelling

enhance

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

independent thinking

skill

Fix the agreement mistake

skills

show examples

and independent

work

skill

Fix the agreement mistake

skills

show examples

via timeworking.

Finally

students

can learn practical

skill

Fix the agreement mistake

skills

show examples

from

workforce

Add an article

the workforce

show examples

, these

exprience

Correct your spelling

experiences

experience

may help them find a job

Correct quantifier usage

more easiler

show examples

easiler

Correct your spelling

easier

easily

after graduating

form

Correct your spelling

from

show examples

university

. In conclusion, contributing

time

working

Replace the word

work

show examples

before starting

university

will bring some demerits.

Neverless

Correct your spelling

Nevertheless

, I agree that

student

Fix the agreement mistake

students

show examples

should

spending

Change the verb form

spend

be spending

show examples

timeworking

Correct your spelling

time working

before

begining

Correct your spelling

beginning

university

Addtionanlly

Correct your spelling

Additionally

, it is

improtant

Correct your spelling

important

that student should learn how to allocate their

time

between

studies

Wrong verb form

studying

show examples

and working.

Submitted by Nini on Thu Nov 23 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

Your essay at times lacks clarity, which can confuse the reader. Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all ideas are fully developed and not repetitive. Use transition words effectively to establish logical connections between sentences and paragraphs. Avoid abrupt changes in thought.

coherence cohesion

Despite having an introduction and conclusion, there are several grammatical and spelling errors which make it difficult to follow. Introduction and conclusion should clearly state your position and succinctly summarize your main points. Work on proofreading and refining your writing for greater impact and readability.

coherence cohesion

Your essay presents general statements rather than fully supported main points. Consider providing more specific examples and detailed explanations to strengthen your argument. When mentioning benefits or drawbacks, elaborate on these ideas with concrete examples or data to illustrate your point effectively

task achievement

The response to the task is somewhat complete, but your position is not clear throughout the essay. Make sure that your opinion is stated clearly in the introduction and that your body paragraphs consistently support this stance. Address the prompt directly and ensure that all parts of the task are answered comprehensively.

task achievement

The essay has some ideas related to the topic, but they are often vague or underdeveloped. To achieve a clear and comprehensive presentation of ideas, expand on each point with more detail, provide rationale for your opinions, and show deeper analysis.

task achievement

Examples used are somewhat relevant, but they lack specificity and development. For a higher score, ensure that your examples are directly linked to the argument you are making and that they are explained in enough detail to support your points convincingly.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
47Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

228 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

practical experience
academic learning
theoretical concepts
soft skills
time management
financial burden
tuition fees
student loans
work experience
competitive job market
career goals
field of study
cultural exposure
global mindset
career progression
academic skills atrophy
period of adjustment

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages.
Undoubtedly, young generation is the backbone of any country as they are from that age group which helps a nation to run smoothly. In this contemporary world, population of some countries include majority of youngsters as compared to the aged population. This situation has its own pros and cons, and I will discuss both views and my opinion that this situation has more disadvantages than the advantages.
5
band
Some people think that the teenage years are the happiest times of most people's lives. Others think that adult life brings more happiness, in spite of greater responsibilities
While thinking about the teenage hood, some people believe that most happiest age of the life without authorised duties, the others think that after age twenty is the most pleasurable. I completely agree with the first statement and I am going to elaborate on both perspectives in forthcoming paragraphs.
4.5
band
Compared to the past, more people are now studying abroad because it is more convenient and cheaper than before. Do you think this is beneficial to the foreign student's home country? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.
• There is no denying the fact that a lot of students are studying abroad due to the affordable education and the comfortable environment in this essay I will analyse the impact on the student’s original country and I will demonstrate my point of view. To begin with i think more students are studying outside their countries due to a better education process which can evolve their knowledge and confidence and skills however studying outside your country and far from your family has lots of advantages and disadvantages and I will analyse both points firstly the student will be responsible in other words they will have the control of hundred percent of their lives which help in evolving the personality they can wash the clothes and clean the house and be fully independent . Secondly they can have lot of free time and use it to learn lot of stuff and these things lead to upgrade the student’s home country thirdly they will meet people from different nationalities which can help to expan...
7
band
The increase in production and consumption of meat has resulted in the destruction of the natural environment. What is the cause?What can be done to solve the problem?
In today’s climate, the issue of increasing the consumption of meat has become a controversial issue. There is a widely held view that this is mainly rooted in overpopulation and the meat’s cost, there do exist a number of measures that could play a key role in curbing the vexing issue of overusing meat.
5.5
band
Some governments provide financial assistance for retired, unemployed and disabled citizens. In other countries, families provide support for these people. Discuss both systems and give your opinion about which one you think is better.
It is widely known that in some countries the government assists the elderly citizens by providing financial help, in other parts of the world the families take up this role. This essay will analyse both arguments and give reasons why it is the duty of the family to take care of the elderly or retired population.

students should spend timeworking before beginning their university studies. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages.

Some people think that the teenage years are the happiest times of most people's lives. Others think that adult life brings more happiness, in spite of greater responsibilities

Compared to the past, more people are now studying abroad because it is more convenient and cheaper than before. Do you think this is beneficial to the foreign student's home country? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

The increase in production and consumption of meat has resulted in the destruction of the natural environment. What is the cause?What can be done to solve the problem?

Some governments provide financial assistance for retired, unemployed and disabled citizens. In other countries, families provide support for these people. Discuss both systems and give your opinion about which one you think is better.