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Band 5.5

The diagram below gives the information about the Hawaiian island chain in the centre of the Pacific Ocean.

The diagram below gives the information about the Hawaiian island chain in the centre of the Pacific Ocean.
#information #hawaiian #island #chain #centre #ocean
The diagram shows the information about the Hawaiian
Island
chain
 which is located in the middle of the Pacific Ocean.
Overall
,
Hawaii
have
Change the verb form
has
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 8 major
island
 and many little
islands
 which are circled by water.
Hawaiian
Correct article usage
The Hawaiian
show examples
Islands
 is a popular tourist destination. It's because of the many volcanos located under the
chain
. The oldest
volcano
is
Verb problem
has
show examples
existing
Wrong verb form
existed
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 since
first
Change the article
the first
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human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
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have
Unnecessary verb
apply
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stepped
to
Change preposition
onto
show examples
 the
island
. Eruption processing in the bottom of the solid dense rock, at 2883 kilometres underground. The 'hot spot' spume located upside of the erupting zone remains static and doesn't move. Magma
spuma
Correct your spelling
puma
 stands even higher, but lower than
volcano
Add an article
a volcano
the volcano
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,
in
Change preposition
on
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 the Pacific plate. The edge of the
volcano
 is located at one of the
islands
 in the
Hawaii
island
chain
 and
built
Add a missing verb
is built
show examples
 up by numerous eruptions. There are thousands of
islands
 in the Pacific.
As
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Like
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 many other
islands
,
Hawaii
 was 'born' when two
litospheric
Correct your spelling
lithospheric
 plates crashed into each other.
Islands
 named by the names of great ancient mythologic Gods: Niihau,
Kaual
Correct your spelling
Kauai
, Oahu,
Molokaim
Correct your spelling
Molokai
 Lanai, Kahoolawe and Maui. The
chain
named
Add a missing verb
is named
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 by the name of the biggest and southern
island
 called
Hawaii
. In conclusion,
diagram
Add an article
the diagram
a diagram
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 is a great way to observe the history of
volcano
Fix the agreement mistake
volcanoes
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in
Change preposition
at
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 the bottom of the ocean and
Hawaii
islands
, because it includes all
necessary
Correct article usage
the necessary
show examples
 information and data.
Submitted by kamashzhazira on

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Linking words: Add more linking words.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 70%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words island, chain, hawaii, islands, volcano with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "diagram" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "information" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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