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Writing Samples /
Band 5

A museum near your house is looking for people to do part-time voluntary/unpaid work. You would like to do some voluntary/unpaid work at the museum. Write a letter to the museum director to apply for voluntary/unpaid work in your letter: Explain why you want to do voluntary/unpaid work at the museum Describe some skills and qualities you have that would be useful Give details of when you would be available for work

#museum #house #people #work #director #skills #qualities
Dear sir, I recently received the news related to the voluntary work in the town museum. Well, I totally understand my responsibilities of being a responsible citizen.
Along with
this
, my university
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 given me a project to do part-time society service for 6 months.
Therefore
, I really
wan
Correct your spelling
want
show examples
 to join the group.
Moreover
, not only
I
Add a missing verb
do I
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inherit some good leadership skills but
also
 I am very
co-operative
Correct your spelling
cooperative
show examples
 in managing work with all the society members
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 might prove a good help for becoming
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 member of
this
voulntary
Correct your spelling
voluntary
 organisation.
However
, I
also
 worked as
an
Change the article
a
show examples
voluntar
Correct your spelling
volunteer
 at the time of
opening
Correct article usage
the opening
show examples
 of
town
Correct article usage
the town
show examples
liberary
Correct your spelling
library
. I am keenly interested
to start
Change preposition
in starting
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 as soon as possible
to start
Verb problem
apply
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.
Hence
, I can come
this
 following Monday morning to get registered
as well as
 you can provide me with the details about
timming
Correct your spelling
timing
trimming
 that I should be providing my service. I really appreciate you for giving me
this
 chance and
gaining
Wrong verb form
gain
show examples
 more experience in life. Yours Sincerely, Nav
Submitted by ss6802125 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph presents a clear and distinct idea, improving the logical flow of the letter.
task achievement
Always address the recipient appropriately using 'Dear Director' and sign off with 'Yours sincerely' followed by your full name to maintain formality.
task achievement
Refrain from casual language and maintain a consistent formal tone throughout the letter.
coherence cohesion
To enhance cohesion, use a range of linking words and phrases to connect ideas and make the letter easier to follow.
coherence cohesion
Clearly structure the letter into introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion to meet the expectations of the task.
task achievement
Expand on the details of your availability by specifying days and times when you are free to work.
coherence cohesion
Correct grammatical errors and ensure the correct use of past and present tenses to improve the quality of your writing.
task achievement
Provide specific examples of your skills and experience related to the museum work to strengthen your application.
task achievement
Avoid using contractions such as 'I'm' and instead use the full form 'I am' to keep the writing formal.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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