Some people say that the best way to teach children to behave well is to punish them. Others argue that rewarding and praising children is a better way to teach them the difference betweeen right and wrong. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Raising
children
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with
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in
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good
manner
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manners
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is hard but teaching them
which
Correct pronoun usage
what
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is good and bad is even harder. Some parents punish their
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
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while
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others
tried
Wrong verb form
try
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to make them understand without
punishment
Use synonyms
.
This
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essay will discuss
the
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apply
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both
opinion
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opinions
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because, sometimes we need to punish for
the
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apply
show examples
wrong
doing
Unnecessary verb
apply
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at the same time not all
the
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apply
show examples
mistakes are punishable. Parenting
one
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is one
show examples
of the
challeging
Correct your spelling
challenging
task
Fix the agreement mistake
tasks
show examples
, when our
children
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doing
Wrong verb form
do
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bad things we need correct them, in most
cases
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cases,
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people
giving
Wrong verb form
give
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physical
punishment
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like hitting,
make
Wrong verb form
making
show examples
them
starving
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starve
show examples
and more.
However
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, punishing
child
Fix the agreement mistake
children
show examples
is acceptable but it should not be violent because
children
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who are growing up with
violent
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violence
show examples
facing
Wrong verb form
face
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seriouse psycological
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serious psychological
issues even after they
grown
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grow
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up.
Therefore
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, best to give the
punishment
Use synonyms
which
make
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makes
show examples
them realise the mistake.
On the other hand
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, giving
reward
Correct article usage
a reward
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to
child
Correct article usage
a child
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for his bad behaviour is not good.
This
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will make them
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
do more ill manner activities. But if the
children
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made the mistake
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for
Add the comma(s)
, for
show examples
instance, getting low marks in
exam
Correct article usage
an exam
show examples
is not entirely their
falt
Correct your spelling
fault
show examples
and the reason could be anything.
Therefore
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, in
this
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situation
Add a comma
situation,
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parents should give rewards or praise to their child to make them encourage and do well
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
next time. In conclusion, to
decide teaching
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teach
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children
Use synonyms
using
punishment
Use synonyms
or rewards is hard because it
is depend
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depends
show examples
on the situation
whereas
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, giving violent discipline is not good either.
Therefore
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, to discipline the little ones use the best option
instead
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make
Wrong verb form
of making
show examples
them
more bad
Replace the words
worse
show examples
.
Submitted by n_wara11 on

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coherence cohesion
The essay demonstrates a limited level of logical structure, often presenting ideas in a confusing or disorderly manner. To improve, create an outline before writing that includes a clear introduction, body paragraphs with distinct ideas, and a logical conclusion. Use transition words to connect ideas and paragraphs effectively.
task achievement
The introduction and conclusion are present but they are not effectively crafted. The introduction should clearly introduce the topic and your thesis statement, while the conclusion should succinctly summarize the main points discussed and restate your opinion. Ensure to fully address each part of the task throughout your essay.
task achievement
The main points in the essay lack adequate development and support. Each paragraph should center around one main idea and be expanded with explanations, arguments, or examples. Be sure to fully elaborate on your points to strengthen the overall argument. Avoid generalizations and strive to include specific, relevant examples to support your points.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • discipline
  • boundaries
  • consequences
  • authority
  • corrective action
  • morality
  • resentment
  • parent-child relationship
  • communication
  • transgressions
  • positive reinforcement
  • internalize
  • self-esteem
  • intrinsic motivation
  • praise
  • competitiveness
  • external validation
  • manipulative behaviors
  • comprehensive understanding
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