Nowadays, more and more people are moving from the countryside to cities, which are becoming overcrowded. What are the reasons for this movement to cities and what can be done to reduce it? ALWAYS read the topic clearly and work out exactly what you have to write abou

#people #countryside #cities #movement #topic #work #abou

In the beginning ,Whilst some proponents assert that living in the

metropoloses

Correct your spelling

metropolises

metropolis

is more convenient for

advanced

Correct article usage

an advanced

show examples

lifestyle,

countryside

residents advocate the other direction.I am of the belief that dwelling in the urban

area

best

Change the article

the best

show examples

place for workforce chances and educational opportunities. On the one hand, the chief advantage of

countryside

Add an article

the countryside

show examples

is related to health,

wherase

Correct your spelling

whereas

where

cities

Change the noun form

city

show examples

dwellers suffer from air pollution.

This

means that when some people take the decision to reside in

urban

Add an article

an urban

show examples

area

this

lead to

Correct article usage

an icrease

show examples

icrease

Correct your spelling

increase

their

Change preposition

in their

show examples

chance

to be

Change preposition

of being

show examples

employed faster, and

well educated

Add a hyphen

well-educated

show examples

as well.

For instance

, a recent study conducted by WHO

reveales

Correct your spelling

reveals

revealed

that the employment rate in civic

area

Fix the agreement mistake

areas

show examples

is three times more than

rural

Change preposition

in rural

show examples

one

Correct pronoun usage

ones

show examples

Hence

, the financial and educational factors are the main motive for

that

Correct determiner usage

the

show examples

internal

immigation

Correct your spelling

immigration

process when it comes to

statisic

Correct your spelling

statistic

statistical

statistics

analysis.

Nevertheless

, the step that should be taken to lessen moving toward urban areas is a governmental action to

decentralizing

Wrong verb form

decentralise

show examples

the multinational

factories

Change noun form

factories'

factory's

show examples

location. To

exaplain

Correct your spelling

explain

that , commuting workers are seeking

fulltime

Correct your spelling

full-time

show examples

job, if that

factories

Change noun form

factory's

show examples

distribution

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

changed to a rural

area

, it will

definetily

Correct your spelling

definitely

accelerate that objective.

For example

, the

Egyption

Correct your spelling

Egyptian

government has recently legislated that dictates that the second branch of any enterprise should be located in the

countryside

.A second role to decrease that

migation

Correct your spelling

migration

mitigation

is building

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

new colleges and educational institutions in the outskirts of the capitals.

Therefore

, what can be is that the governmental strategy

play

Change the verb form

plays

show examples

a crucial role in developing the

countryside

. In conclusion,

after

this

essay has

manifestes

Correct your spelling

manifested

manifests

manifestos

that

Correct determiner usage

the

show examples

points

mentionted

Correct your spelling

mentioned

above, it can be said that the education level and high employment rate are the main reason

Change preposition

for

show examples

that migration.

However

, the

geiographaical

Correct your spelling

geographical

reallocation of

that

Correct determiner usage

those

show examples

resources can redesign the

countryside

Change noun form

countryside's

show examples

future.

Submitted by madany1976 on Fri Nov 24 2023

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Coherence & Cohesion

In terms of coherence and cohesion, the essay would benefit from a clearer logical structure. This includes improving paragraph transitions to ensure a seamless flow of ideas from one point to the next. Use cohesive devices correctly and thoughtfully to link sentences and paragraphs together.

Task Achievement

To improve task achievement, ensure that you fully address all parts of the prompt. Expand on your main points with well-developed ideas and specific examples. Your essay should also maintain a consistent focus on the topic without deviating to unrelated subjects.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
37Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

282 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Nowadays, more and more people are moving from the countryside to cities, which are becoming overcrowded. What are the reasons for this movement to cities and what can be done to reduce it? ALWAYS read the topic clearly and work out exactly what you have to write abou

Your opinion

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It is said that people’s life now is becoming more and more stressful. What are the causes and how to solve it?

Some people believe that anyone can create art such as painting, poetry, music and so on. Others think that a person should have special abilities to create art. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Some people believe that money for education should mainly be spent on better computers while others believe it would be better spent on teachers. Discuss both the view and give your own opinion.

Some people say history is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in today’s world, subjects like science and technology are more important than history. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.