You are going to another country to study. You would like to do a part-time job while you are studying, so you want to ask a friend who lives there for some help. Write a letter to this friend. In your letter, • give details of your study plans • explain why you want to get a part-time job • suggest how your friend could help you find a job

#country #study #job #friend #lives #help #plans

Dear Prabh, How are you? I hope your work life is going amazing, as you are doing your dream job. I want to share some good news with you. I am coming to Canada, yes it is true man! unbelievable right

Change the punctuation

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I got an admission to Practical Nursing at Algonquin College in Ottawa, near you.

Initially

, I Require some help regarding finding a part-time job

along with

my studies. I remember you mentioned before, that you have been working as a security guard for a long time now. If you can refer me to your company would help me a lot. I am determined to find part-time work to earn some money and later, can invest in my fees. My parents helped with the tuition fees for the first year and I do not want to burden them again. I need your assistance to find a work which does not disturb my studies and

also

pays a good amount. You have been in

this

country for a long time now. So, you know various jobs and can help to find. I should try everywhere so that I would have numerous options. I hope you help me and provide your assistance Yours lovingly, Harshit

Submitted by harshitkaur321 on Sun Jun 09 2024

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organization

The letter is well-organized, but you may want to ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single idea more clearly. For instance, the paragraph about working as a security guard could be separated into why you need a part-time job and how your friend can help you find one.

grammar

Consider making minor corrections to perfect the grammar, such as changing 'Require' to 'require' or 'find a work' to 'find work.'

development

Although the letter covers the required points, expanding on each point slightly could provide a more thorough response.

task completion

You successfully addressed the purpose of your letter, which is to seek help from your friend in finding a part-time job.

tone

The writing tone is friendly and appropriate for a letter to a friend.

organization

The letter has a clear structure with distinct paragraphs for different aspects of the topic.

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

203 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Educational aspirations
Work experience
Financial independence
Resume (or CV)
Local job market
International student
Legal requirements
Student work permit
Employment trends
Time management
Networking
A part-time position
Balance studies and work
Job hunting strategies

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Some people believe the the best way to learn English is to study with native teachers. What do you think about this opinion?

An English-speaking friend wants to spend a two-week holiday in your region and has written asking for information and advice. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter: * Offer to find somewhere to stay * Give advice about what to do * Give information about what clothes to bring

The government should ban smoking in all public places, even though this would restrict some other people’s freedoms. Do you agree or disagree

In many countries, traditional dress and costumes are considered effective way of maintaining links with the past. How effective can traditional costumer be, in this sense? What other ways exit to help citizens connect with a country’s past?

New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do advantages of this outweigh disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experiences.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+