Childhood obesity is becoming a severe issue in many nations. This essay will look at some primary causes of this and offer some possible solutions to the problem.

#childhood #obesity #nations #offer

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

At present, obesity is the biggest issue among

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

infants across the world.

This

is a most crucial problem in some nations

due to

more cravings, eating

junk

food and

Correct article usage

a sendentary

show examples

sendentary

Correct your spelling

sedentary

lifestyle. Changing eating healthy habits and doing physical activity is the curable remedy to

this

trouble.

This

essay will discuss it briefly for the following reasons. There are some

maia

Correct your spelling

main

reasons for children

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

being

over weight

Correct your spelling

overweight

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

their childhood period.

Firstly

, infants

are eaten

Wrong verb form

eat

show examples

Remove the article

apply

show examples

plenty of

junk

foods

and carbonated drinks in their day-to-day

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

due to

Change preposition

because

show examples

they are more found with

junk

foods

Change the noun form

food

show examples

tastes.

Secondly

eating

Wrong verb form

they eat

show examples

more frequently especially at midnight because cravings are stimulated to eat plenty,

as a consequence

, they are

being

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

obssed

Correct your spelling

obsessed

abused

bossed

Thirdly

, toddlers are being sedendary lifestyle at present

such

as playing video games, browsing

Correct article usage

the internets

show examples

internets

Fix the agreement mistake

internet

show examples

and using

socisl

Correct your spelling

social

medias

Correct your spelling

media

show examples

. These are the main reasons for children are being

over

Rephrase

apply

show examples

weighted

Correct your spelling

weighed

show examples

. There are several possible actions that could be taken to mitigate the issue mentioned above.

Firstly

, infants should eat

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

healthy

foods

like fruits and

vegeatbles

Correct your spelling

vegetables

in their daily meals and they should avoid all

junk

foods

Secondly

, kids must do outdoor physical activity in their free time rather

then

Replace the word

than

show examples

being

sedendary

Correct your spelling

sedentary

lifestyle in order to they can be fit.

Finally

, stop eating frequently and stop cravings thoughts like eating more

fiber

Change the spelling

fibre

show examples

foods

insted

Correct your spelling

instead

of carbs. These are the possible solutions

are

Correct pronoun usage

that are

show examples

assisted to reduce

this

situation.

To conclude

, toddlers

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

being

over weight

Correct your spelling

overweight

show examples

is the most

importance

Replace the word

important

show examples

problem in some nations we have to address it with the

above mentioned

Add a hyphen

above-mentioned

show examples

remedies. Parents should monitor their

kids

Change noun form

kid's

kids'

show examples

eating behaviour whether they eat

healty

Correct your spelling

healthy

or not.

Submitted by reanudeepan on Sat Nov 25 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

There are noticeable issues with grammar, punctuation, and word choice throughout the essay, which can lead to reduced coherence. Consider revising for correct grammar usage, proper punctuation, and vocabulary accuracy.

task achievement

Work on developing your ideas more fully. Each point mentioned requires further explanation and exploration to create a strong argument.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
34
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

274 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
It is important for children to learn the diffrence between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what wxtent do you agree or disagree with this opinion. what sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behavior to children
At the earliest posible it is essential that leaeing between right or wrong for the younger kids and also sometime mayneed to be strict. In this eassy i am going to explain about why punishment is nessary and then explin why i agree.
4
band
Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Nowadays, many university students are trying to improve their knowledge in various subjects rather than their main stream, while others believe that it is a waste of time and they must focus on their main subjects hense, they can expertise their own stream. In my opinion, I also agree with the first part due to the fact that, learning more things can open up more paths to the future.
5.5
band
The best way to make road transport safe is to require drivers to take a driving test every year. How much do you agree or disagree?
There is an awesome way to make our roads transport highly secure and this is by requiring drivers to be tested on driving skills every year. I totally agree with this statement because there are many careless people causing silly accidents and there are many citizens who do not maintain enough skills to keep their driver license.
5.5
band
It is importatnt for people to take risk, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweight the disadvantages?
Both in their careers and their individual lives, it is crucial for humankind to take risks. In today's climate, engage in risk-taking has become controversial minefield. However, some people find it too hazardous to take daring actions, there's always good side in it.
6
band
Nowadays, more and more children play computer games. Why do you think this is the case? Is it a positive or negative development?
In our technological era, the number of children playing online games significantly increases every year. This is caused by the influence of technology on teenagers, however, it has negative impacts on children's health.

Childhood obesity is becoming a severe issue in many nations. This essay will look at some primary causes of this and offer some possible solutions to the problem.

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The best way to make road transport safe is to require drivers to take a driving test every year. How much do you agree or disagree?

It is importatnt for people to take risk, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweight the disadvantages?

Nowadays, more and more children play computer games. Why do you think this is the case? Is it a positive or negative development?