Nowadays many young people are attracted to dangerous sport such as snowboarding or mountain biking. What makes these sports so attractive? What measures should be taken to minimize the risks?

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In recent days a lot of teenagers choose potentially harmful kinds of

sports

Use synonyms

such

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as snowboarding or mountain biking. The main reason why they do

this

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is the feeling of achieving and mastery. Education and training can be observed as the main solution which can be helpful for the elimination of the risks of

such

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harmful activity. A lot of young people want to achieve outstanding results in extreme kinds of

sports

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This

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kind of mastering can produce an exciting impression on society and a wonderful feeling of achievement.

In other words

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this

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sort of feedback is necessary for youngsters in terms of supporting their self-esteem.

This

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is because social nets,

such

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as Instagram provide an opportunity to demonstrate dangerous

sports

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accomplishments to a wide number of people and get common admiration and greetings.

For instance

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, the young generation can post pictures and videos of crazy things and become a hero among their friends.

Consequently

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, that sort of behaviour often brings to traumas or even death. Training and education can be the best solution to

this

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matter. Well-educated teenagers can eliminate possibility of the harmful effects. Mastering achieved under the control of a professional teacher can be helpful in avoiding injuries.

On the other hand

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, right psychologically trained young person would not postering over the limit and would be able to keep self-concentration and focus on security measures.

Moreover

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, strict prohibition of harmful

sports

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activity without training certification can reduce the potential number of casualties.

For example

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, mandatory Everest Mountain climbing for non-trained rock climbers helped to decrease the number of deaths by 17 per cent in 1982.

To sum up

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, the main reason for doing harmful kinds of

sports

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is to achieve self-esteem support. The training and study of extreme

sports

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with mandatory participation without qualification can be applied as the main solution to

this

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issue.

tarasovnnSat Nov 25 2023

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structure

Make sure your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. The introduction and conclusion must restate the essay question and summarize your main points. Your essay had an introduction and a conclusion, but they could be more clearly delineated and more reflective of the essay's content.

content

Develop your paragraphs with clear main ideas and support each point with specific examples or details. Your essay touches on relevant points but lacks depth in development and specificity in examples provided.

cohesion

Ensure logical sequencing of ideas and use a range of cohesive devices to help the reader follow your argument. While you've attempted to connect your ideas, transitions between them can be smoother, and the overall cohesion of the essay can be improved.

task response

Address all parts of the task sufficiently. The essay provides an overview of why young people are drawn to extreme sports and how risks could be mitigated, but more details and development are necessary to completely satisfy the task requirements.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

307 words

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Nowadays many young people are attracted to dangerous sport such as snowboarding or mountain biking. What makes these sports so attractive? What measures should be taken to minimize the risks?

Due to the low cost of flights, many people are choosing to holiday abroad rather than have holidays in their own country. What are the advantages and disadvantages to this.

Environmental issues such as climate change have always been an international problem because governments are not imposing harsh punishments against offenders. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Support your answer with specific reasons and examples.

The developments in Happy valley shopping center from 1982 to 2012 is represent by maps.

Many animal species in the world are becoming extinct nowadays. Some people say that countries and individuals should protect these animals form dying out, while others say we should concentrate more on problems of human beings. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In the advertising, businesses nowadaways usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you thinkn it is a positive or negative development?