Nowadays, more and more people engage in dangerous activities, such as sky diving and motorcycling. Are you in favour of them? Use examples to support your opinion.
Conducting horrible tasks like skydiving and motorbike stunts is considered a dangerous activity
due to
their detrimental consequences but in my opinion, it is not as disastrous if it could be taken under proper circumstances. At this
point of juncture, my contention will be further
elaborated with relevant support along with
a logical conclusion.
To embark on, these challenging activities brings positive outcomes for people who indulge themselves .The main proficient effect it could assist folks in improving their mental health.To illustrate,while
doing sky diving people can overcome their fears of heights because most of the time they are flying in the air as a result
it helps them to be brave and fearless.Additionally
, games like races on motorcycles could encourage them to be competitive player which helps them to enhance their self-confidence and personal growth.
However
, there are ample causes behind having these interests among the public.The prime one is their thrill and excitement towards these things to do.Individuals have a passion since their childhood to pursue difficult tasks like participating in stunt supports and sky diving which expelling them to fulfil their dreams.Moreover
,sometimes it is related to their study or work to perform
complete their courses or duties at the job.
Verb problem
apply
Also
, it is becoming a trend among young people to engage themselves in these challenging situations to improve their status in front of other competitors.
In conclusion, there are meritorious aspects behind this
statement but in my opinion, I believe that it could be possible if a person has proper knowledge and training to do so without sufficient guidance it would be considered a life-threatening event.Submitted by kaurbhagwant95 on
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word choice
Be mindful of phrasing and word choice to ensure clarity. For example, 'Conducting horrible tasks like skydiving and motorbike stunts' might be better phrased as 'Participating in extreme activities like skydiving and motorcycling.'
grammar
Ensure grammatical correctness, particularly with verb tenses and article usage. Small inaccuracies can distract from the overall effectiveness of your message.
vocabulary
Try to diversify your vocabulary more to enhance the richness of your essay. Using varied words and expressions can make your points more compelling.
detail
Consider adding more specific, real-world examples to support your arguments. This can strengthen your essay by providing clear evidence to back up your points.
structure
Good logical flow and essay structure, making your points easy to follow.
examples
Effective use of examples to illustrate your points, particularly the benefits of overcoming fear through activities like skydiving.
conclusion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your opinion and the rationale behind it, providing a clear standpoint.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.