IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

You are preparing an event in the countryside. Write a letter to your friend and ask for help with the arrangements. What the event is. Why the event is being held? What arrangements have already been made? How your friend can help?

#event #countryside #friend #arrangements
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
I strongly believe that using
prepaid
Add an article
a prepaid
show examples
 card to consume electricity is more beneficial than the current system because it saves time and decreases
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
power consumption. Many Individual these days are
extremley
Correct your spelling
extremely
 busy in their daily life and frequently miss bills .
Instead
 of paying
invoiced
Correct article usage
the invoiced
show examples
ammount
Correct your spelling
amount
 in
current
Correct article usage
the current
show examples
 department introducing the recharged cards will help them
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
pay the amount from the home in advance.
Additionally
, based on the monthly forecast one can
setup
Correct your spelling
set up
show examples
 their banking account to
auto recharge
Add a hyphen
auto-recharge
show examples
 the card so that one might
no
Correct your spelling
not
show examples
 miss the payments. In our
city
Add a comma
city,
show examples
 the power consumption is drastically inclining
due to
increase
Correct article usage
the increase
show examples
 in electric appliances .A plethora of
indiviuals
Correct your spelling
individuals
 are unaware of
Correct article usage
the powerintake
show examples
powerintake
Correct your spelling
power intake
 of their appliances
due to
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
 of insights.Prepaid cards will provide
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 complete overview of their usage and
limits
Change the verb form
limit
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
unwanted usage
. .
Replace the punctuation
.
...
show examples
Moreover
,
This
also
 indirectly contributes to clean energy . Based on the
afermentioned
Correct your spelling
aforementioned
 reasoning , I still stand by my stance that Physical cards are
Correct article usage
a vaible
show examples
vaible
Correct your spelling
viable
available
 option.Again,
this
 is my personal opinion I support the decision taken by the board
Submitted by vicky.kallem on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

greeting and closing
Ensure your letter has a clear opening and closing statement, which are essential in letter writing. A friendly greeting and a sign-off are necessary to fulfill the conventions of letter format.
single idea per paragraph
Your paragraphs should each contain a singular, coherent thought or argument. Avoid merging multiple ideas in a single paragraph and make a new paragraph for each separate point.
complete response
The task was to write a letter to a friend about an event in the countryside and ask for their help. Your writing did not address this task at all. It's crucial to address the required topic to fulfill the task.
suitable writing tone
When writing a personal letter, especially to a friend, the tone should be friendly, intimate, and personal. The tone in the writing is impersonal and more suitable for an essay or a report, not a letter to a friend.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: