IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The given pie charts provide data about the distribution of school funds in the UK over the period of 20 years from 1981 to 2001.

The given pie charts provide data about the distribution of school funds in the UK over the period of 20 years from 1981 to 2001.
#data #distribution #school #funds #uk #period #years
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The given pie charts provide data about the distribution of school funds in the UK over the period of 20 years from 1981 to 2001. Evidently, a majority of total money was allocated to the salaries of teachers throughout,
while
Linking Words
 insurance accounted for the lowest proportion with a constant rise during these years
in contrast
Linking Words
 to other worker's
wage
Fix the agreement mistake
wages
show examples
 that declined constantly. As far as the salary of teachers is concerned, 40
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of
total
Add an article
the total
show examples
 was spent in 1981, which
has been
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
 increased a decade later, compromising half of the total,
then
Linking Words
 fell by 5
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in the
last
Linking Words
 decade.
Similarly
Linking Words
, the fund
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
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distributed for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
resources like
book
Fix the agreement mistake
books
show examples
 experienced a
zig zag
Add a hyphen
zig-zag
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 trend, accounting for 15 of every 100, 20 and 9
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in order of years. With 2
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of
total
Add an article
the total
show examples
 in 1981, Insurance was the section with
lowest
Change the article
the lowest
show examples
 inflow. Despite climbing constantly to 8
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
, it held the lowest position during the given decades.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, the share of other
worker's
Fix the agreement mistake
workers'
show examples
 salaries was 28
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
, the second highest,
at
Change the preposition
in
show examples
 the beginning, which dropped to 22 and 15
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in 1991 and 2001 respectively.
AS
Correct your spelling
As
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 for furniture and equipment, after decreasing from 15 in 1981 to 5
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in 1991, it stood at the second highest position by the end of the
last
Linking Words
 decade, with 23 of every 100.
Submitted by amansoore48 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words percent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "data" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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