In many countries, an increase in crime has be blamed on violent images on television and in computer games. To what extend do you agree

#countries #crime #images #television #computer #games

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Exposure to

media

violence and aggressive behavior: discussing research that suggests a correlation between the consumption of violent

media

and aggressive behavior or crime. Desensitization to violence: exploring how frequent exposure to violent images can make individuals less sensitive to the pain and suffering of others. The copycat effect: evaluating instances where individuals may replicate violent acts seen on TV or in games, leading to an uptick in crime. Violent

media

as a scapegoat: arguing that crime rates are influenced by a complex interplay of factors (socio-economic, psychological, environmental) and that violent

media

is often wrongly blamed.

Media

literacy and critical thinking: emphasizing the importance of teaching viewers, especially the youth, to critically assess the

media

they consume and distinguish between fiction and reality. The role of parental supervision and

media

rating systems: assessing the impact of parental guidance and content ratings in mitigating exposure to violence and its potential effects.

Submitted by dineshgodara700 on Mon Nov 27 2023

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structure

The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion, which are crucial for establishing context and summarizing your main points. Ensure that your essay has a well-defined structure with these elements included.

connectors

There seems to be unclear or missing logical connections between the different points discussed. Make sure to use linking words and phrases to connect ideas smoothly.

development

While the main points are mentioned, they lack the necessary development and support through examples or data. Each main point should be elaborated upon with specific examples or evidence.

task response

The response to the task is incomplete as the prompt asks to what extent you agree with a given statement, which requires you to take a clear position and support it throughout the essay.

clarity

Ideas presented in the essay are not fully clear or comprehensive. Clarify your stance and ensure that your arguments are articulated in a more comprehensible manner.

examples

There are no relevant, specific examples to support the points made. Use real-life instances, studies, or statistics to strengthen your arguments and make them more persuasive.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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0
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

6 paragraphs

151 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

correlation
aggressive behavior
desensitization
copycat effect
media literacy
violent imagery
scapegoat
media consumption
psychological impact
content rating
parental supervision
media influence
computer games
behavioral studies
socio-economic factors

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In many countries, an increase in crime has be blamed on violent images on television and in computer games. To what extend do you agree

Fully explain your ideas

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Discuss the impact of social media on creating opportunities and changing the nature of interactions among young people.

Some people think that advertising may have positive economic effects. Others think it has negative social effects because advertising makes individuals less satisfied with what they are and have. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Employers should give holidays of at least one month to employees to encourage them to perform better at workplace. To what extent do you agree or disagree?