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Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#plans #show #park #first #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The two maps demonstrate the same public
park
 called Grange
Park
 from its 1920 opening and its present version.
Overall
, the
park
 has not changed in terms of square meters but nearly the whole interior design has changed. The only areas on the layout that have not changed are the two entrances located at Arnold Avenue and Eldon Street and one rose
garden
 located at the upper left corner of the
park
. In 1920, when we used the entrance on Eldon Street we were welcomed by the fountain
that is
also
 a centre of the
park
. Today, it is replaced with
rose
Correct article usage
a rose
show examples
garden
 with four different seating
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
surronding
Correct your spelling
surrounding
 it. On the right
side
, there was a rose
garden
 and pond water plants at the upper
side
, a glasshouse and seats at the downsideside. Today, there is a cafe in the
area
 where the rose
garden
 was before and pond water plants converted into a children’s play
area
. Glasshouse and seats at the down
side
 replaced with a water feature and there is an entrance to an undergarden car
park
 that was
also
 constructed after 1920. On the left
side
, in 1920, there was a stage for musicians in the middle and rose gardens between two seats at the both up and
down sides
Correct your spelling
downsides
show examples
 of the
park
. Today, four seating
area
 and one rose
garden
 have been removed, only the upper rose
garden
 remain the same.
Finally
, the stage for musicians was replaced with an amphitheatre for concerts.
Submitted by asik.melliss on

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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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