IELTS Writing The gap between the rich and the poor is becoming wider; the rich are becoming richer and the poor are even getting poorer. What problems can the situation cause? What can be done to reduce this gap? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

#ielts #gap #situation

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The two diagrams show information about the rate of

owners'

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owners

show examples

mobile

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of mobile

show examples

phones. The

first

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picture illustrates mobile phone , internet and social

media

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use

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more common in advanced

economies

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. The second graph shows information about the

number

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of smartphone

users

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. The

first

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figure

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demonstrates information about mobile technology,

internet

Correct article usage

the internet

show examples

and social

media

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use

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more common . Interestingly ,

people

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who own

mobiles phone

Fix the agreement mistake

mobile phones

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in advanced

economies

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is higher

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than

show examples

percent

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than

Change preposition

in emergence

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emergence

Replace the word

emergency

show examples

economies

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(84

percent

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). Adults who own

smartphones

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in advanced

economies

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Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

percent

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and in

emergingence

Correct your spelling

emerging

economies

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percent

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. We saw

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show examples

the picture how many

people

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use

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the internet and social

media

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in advanced

economies

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percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

and 60

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percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

whichit

Correct your spelling

which it

which

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apply

show examples

0.5 bigger than in emerging

economies

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(60 %) .

People

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who

use

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social

media

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in emerging

economies

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smaller

Change preposition

show examples

Use synonyms

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

than in advanced

economies

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(67 %). The second

figure

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illustrates

Correct article usage

the numbers

show examples

numbers

Fix the agreement mistake

number

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of smartphone

users

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from 2016 to 2021.We saw a positive trendline which started in 2016 with 2,5 billion

people

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and increased by 3.8 billion

peoplehumans

Correct your spelling

people

in 2021.Every year

Correct article usage

the

show examples

number

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of smartphone

users

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grow

Correct subject-verb agreement

grows

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almost on

Rephrase

to approximately

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0.2 or 0.3 billion

people

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every year.In 2021

this

Linking Words

number

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users

Change preposition

of users

show examples

who used

smartphones

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hit the highest point . In conclusion , the two diagrams above show how many

people

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used

smartphones

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and became popular using mobile technology .The

first

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figure

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illustrates adults in advanced

economies

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bigger

Add a missing verb

are bigger

show examples

than

Correct pronoun usage

those in

show examples

emerging

economies

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. The second

figure

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demonstrates many

people

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started to

use

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mobile phones .

Describinge

Correct your spelling

Describing

Describe

two figures,

and

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apply

show examples

we can say the

first

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graph every year

number

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smartphones

Change the noun form

smartphone

show examples

users

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grow

Wrong verb form

grown

show examples

up between 2016 to 2021.In 2021

this

Linking Words

number

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users

Change preposition

of users

show examples

who used

smartphones

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hit the highest point It is .

Its

Correct pronoun usage

show examples

is interesting to observe ,how technology become popular more and more.

Submitted by dulskywork on Mon Nov 27 2023

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task response

It is imperative to ensure that you fully understand and respond to the prompt provided. The essay you have written does not address the given question about the wealth gap but instead discusses an entirely different topic related to mobile phone usage. Always stay on topic and address the specific question asked.

coherence cohesion

You need to work on organizing your essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea and follow a logical sequence. Use linking words and phrases effectively to connect your ideas and paragraphs.

task achievement

Your essay lacks clear and relevant examples to support your points. Make sure to include specific examples that are directly related to the essay topic to illustrate your points more effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

1
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
10
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
31
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

296 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Economic disparity
Income stratification
Wealth distribution
Socio-economic divide
Affluence
Deprivation
Fiscal policies
Progressive taxation
Living wage
Universal basic income
Social welfare programs
Philanthropic efforts
Educational reforms
Job market accessibility
Inflation
Purchasing power
Wealth accumulation
Capital gains
Minimum wage
Wealth tax
Investment in infrastructure
Economic empowerment
Financial literacy
Poverty alleviation
Social mobility

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Fully explain your ideas

Some people think that traditional culture can be destroyed as money-making attractions to tourists. However, others believe that it is the only way to save traditions. Discuss both views and give you our opinion.

Nowadays, more and more people decide to have children later in their life. What do you think are the reasons for this? Do advantages of this trend outweigh disadvantages?

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. why might this be the case? do you think this is positive or negative development?

in some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people why might this be the case? do you think this is a positive or negative situation?