Task 2: More people put their personal information online (address, telephone number…) for everyday activities such as socializing on social networks or banking purposes. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?
Many
people
believe that,
publishing personal Remove the comma
apply
information
in
social media has positive development Change preposition
on
while
others argue that, it has negative development. According to
my point of view
there are significant drawbacks. In Add a comma
view,
this
essay
I will provide the Add a comma
essay,
evidance
for my point of view.
In the contemporary world computer hackers are Correct your spelling
evidence
becoming increase
around the world. They Wrong verb form
increasing
use
our profile for differnt
Correct your spelling
different
Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
kind
of crimes. Those Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
people
are expert
for keep tracking personal Fix the agreement mistake
experts
details
and trying
find some Add the particle
trying to
loop hole
for Correct your spelling
loophole
success
Correct article usage
the success
their
Change preposition
of their
popurses
. Daily, many individuals complain Correct your spelling
purses
to
Change preposition
about
siber
crime regarding Correct your spelling
cyber
this
issue but they do not decrease post their details
. It will be easy for them to tracking
the Change the form of the verb
track
information
that we posted
Wrong verb form
post
in
Change preposition
on
socail meadia
. Correct your spelling
social media
For example
, some people
send their credit card photos to wife through Vider or Whats App
. Correct your spelling
WhatsApp
This
is not safe. Those things make task
easy for them. Most Add an article
the task
of
hackers Change preposition
apply
use
these
Change the determiner
this information
information
for
get financial benefits.
Change preposition
to
On the other hand
, some people
use
this
information
for damage emotionaly
. Correct your spelling
emotionally
Although
,
it is harmful, many Remove the comma
apply
people
post thier
personal photos and Correct your spelling
their
details
to maintain their status in
Change preposition
on
socail
media Correct your spelling
social
such
as Face Book
and Instagram. Ciber Correct your spelling
FaceBook
crimers
Correct your spelling
crimes
use
these pictures in unethical
Change the article
an unethical
way
to damage Fix the agreement mistake
ways
person's
profile and they Correct article usage
a person's
acpected
to get some money from the users. Nowadays, Correct your spelling
expected
accepted
Correct article usage
the ciber
ciber
crime rate is Correct your spelling
cyber
extremly
high Correct your spelling
extremely
however
, many people
not
aware Add a missing verb
are not
about
Change preposition
of
this
issue.
In conclusion, hackers can use
our details
for different popursoes
, they try to earn some money and some Correct your spelling
purposes
wants
to damage for person's emotions. Correct subject-verb agreement
want
Therefore
, people
need to use
this
technology wisely, if not many people
get benefits from thier
Correct your spelling
their
information
.Submitted by Sa.inaka on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that your essay has a clear structure, with an introduction that presents the topic and your viewpoint, body paragraphs that develop arguments with clear topic sentences, and a conclusion that effectively summarizes the key points.
coherence cohesion
Keep your essay logical and organized. Connect your ideas and paragraphs smoothly using appropriate linking words or phrases. It is important to ensure a natural flow and progression of ideas throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
Support your main points with relevant, specific examples and explanations. This not only strengthens your arguments but also demonstrates your ability to use the language to reason and provide evidence.
task achievement
Address the task thoroughly, ensuring that you respond to all parts of the question. Be sure to discuss both sides of the argument if required and provide a clear opinion when asked.
task achievement
Develop your ideas fully to give a clear, comprehensive response to the task. Avoid vague statements and ensure that your ideas are developed logically and clearly.
task achievement
Use specific examples to support your points. While personal examples are acceptable, they should be relevant and contribute to a clearer understanding of your perspective on the issue. Avoid irrelevant anecdotes or general statements.