Today,many people do not know their neighbours in large cities.What problems does this cause?What can be done about this?
Presently,with the big change
of
Change preposition
in
society
and technology
,people
think that the best chosen
is living at home and more Replace the word
choice
relationship
Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
of
Change preposition
with
neighbours
will slightly decrease.This
essay will disagree that people
do not have any relations with some nearly people
.
Firstly
,large cities are the best place that have
Change the verb form
has
the
strong development of Correct article usage
a
technolgy andthis
is the main cause of Correct your spelling
technology and this
lack
of Correct article usage
the lack
relationship
between Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
people
and people
.Although
the distance between people
's living is not far but
Remove the conjunction
apply
people
still accept that lose the relation of people
by
the way Change preposition
apply
that
always use Correct pronoun usage
they
technology
devices to relax in
Change preposition
for
freedays
. Correct your spelling
free
Besides
that,this
cause will reduce communicate
Replace the word
communication
skill
in Fix the agreement mistake
skills
society
of Add an article
the society
a society
people
and make people
feel a little bit of
scary and shy when Change preposition
apply
talk
to Change the verb form
talking
neighbours
.Do not
Verb problem
Not
have
Wrong verb form
having
the
Correct article usage
apply
relationship
Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
of
Change preposition
with
neighbours
will make people
feel more boring
and Replace the word
bored
people
will spend a lot of time
on social media.
Secondly
, have a lot of methods to solve this
problem easily but people
do not know apply it
in Correct pronoun usage
them
society
exactly
. Rephrase
apply
People
should spend more time
on go
outside and Wrong verb form
going
have
more conservation with Wrong verb form
having
neighbours
or people
can gather together and have an interesting party at the weekend to improve the relation
Replace the word
relationship
of
Change preposition
between
people
. People
should reduce more time
of spend
on Change preposition
spent
technology
devices athough
it can Correct your spelling
although
be help
Change the verb form
help
people
relax and decrease stressful
. Replace the word
stress
People
should avoid have
Change the verb form
having
a bad terms
on Correct the article-noun agreement
bad terms
a bad term
people
to have a better society
.
Taking everything in
account,it can be seen that Change preposition
into
although
the Change preposition
despite
increasingly
development of Change the adverb
increasing
society
and technology
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
people
should spend more time
on the
Change the word
their
relation
Replace the word
relationships
of
Change preposition
with
neighbours
to make a good society
in recent days. Individually, people
should develop yourself
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
by
a lot of methods to improve Change preposition
through
the
Change the word
their
relationship
of Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
people
.Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
Your essay presents a basic structure, but there are issues with logical sequencing and clarity. Sentences seem disjointed and the flow between ideas is not smooth. Use clear topic sentences to begin each paragraph, and ensure that each subsequent sentence logically follows to develop that idea.
task achievement
The response to the task presents some relevant points but lacks development and specificity in examples. Ensure that each paragraph presents a clear main idea followed by specific examples or explanations to fully address all parts of the task. Connect your ideas to the prompt more explicitly.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.