IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

you took a trip, during this trip your suitcase got damaged. write a letter to the bus company, in your letter inform the bus company of when and where you travelled, describe your suitcase and what happened to it, explain why company should pay for a new suitcase.

#trip #suitcase #bus #company
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Dear Mr Smith, I am writing to complain about a serious defect in my suitcase when I was
traveling
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travelling
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 with your agency. On the 1 of November at Haghani Terminal at 5
p.m
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p.m.
 I gave my luggage to your staff for bus number 4321 to Rasht and he put it in the first door of the right load area. Unfortunately, when I received that at Rasht Terminal, I noticed a
big
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lot of
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 damage on the front wheel,
furthermore
 a fracture on its front surface. I said about it to your employees
then
 they referred me to you.
This
 suitcase was the latest design from
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the Pierre
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Pierre
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the Pierre
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 Cardin brand which was 100 cm in
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apply
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the
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apply
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length and 70 cm in
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apply
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the
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apply
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width
also
 with
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a
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the
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a
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 black leather strap around it and
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a white
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white
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a white
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 surface.
Although
 it was in astonishing design and excellent quality is now unusable. As you know
this
 brand is so expensive, I bought that $ 5000 from Paris. I am sure you will understand that
this
 problem is causing me considerable inconvenience,
thus
 I am looking forward to receiving a replacement Or depositing $ 5000 to my visa card as soon as possible. The information about my address and my Visa card number has been attached. Yours Sincerely Vida Shojaee
Submitted by TUTOO on

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Greetings and Closings
Ensure that the opening and closing of the letter are in line with the formal tone typically expected in a complaint letter. Addressing the recipient as 'Mr. Smith' is suitable, but consider avoiding overly casual sign-offs.
Tone
Work on maintaining a formal and polite tone throughout the letter, even when expressing dissatisfaction. Reserve casual language for informal scenarios.
Paragraph Structure
Make sure that each paragraph focuses on a single idea or aspect of the complaint to enhance readability and organization of the content.
Task Achievement
Avoid improbable details, such as the extremely high cost of the suitcase ($5000), which could detract from the credibility of the complaint.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use linking words and transitions smoothly to integrate paragraphs and sentences, aiding in the letter's overall coherence.
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