Buying things on the internet such as book, air ticket and groceries is becoming more and more popular. Do the advantages of shopping in this way outweigh the disadvantages
Thesedays
, Correct your spelling
These days
indivduals
are choosing to buy stuff online rather than visiting Correct your spelling
individuals
to
the local markets. Remove the preposition
apply
Although
people
may have to compromise with the quality of an item, the advantanges
like saving Correct your spelling
advantages
of
Change preposition
apply
time
and money
outweigh the disadvantages.
To begin
with, low-quality
is the main issue of e-shopping. Correct your spelling
low quality
Although
Correct article usage
the discription
discription
of a product includes everything like material, Correct your spelling
description
descriptions
color
, size and brand, many times it is not the same product as Change the spelling
colour
customer
was expecting. Because, in Add an article
a customer
the customer
acutal
some products are of Correct your spelling
actuality
low quality
material which does not Add a hyphen
low-quality
last
for a long time
. But, it would not be the same case if people
shop in-store as they can exmaine
an item properly.
Correct your spelling
examine
However
, the reason to shop online is that people
are having
hectic Wrong verb form
have
sechdule
. Most of the Correct your spelling
schedules
peole
have Correct your spelling
people
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
full
Add a hyphen
full-time
time
jobs on the weekdays and during weekends or holidays, they prefer to spend a
Correct article usage
apply
qualtiy
Correct your spelling
quality
time
with their family and friends. According to
them, it is a waste of time
to join a big line-ups
of the store Correct the article-noun agreement
line-up
while
entering and check
out. Wrong verb form
checking
This
is how they save their time
by using their phones or computers to place an order of
any required item. Change preposition
for
Moreover
, online shopping helps to save a good amount of money
. When a sale or discounts
Fix the agreement mistake
discount
are
going on the apps or site the Correct subject-verb agreement
is
of
store customers Change preposition
apply
recieve
notifications and they can get products online for a cheaper price Correct your spelling
receive
instead
of on
Change preposition
at
regular
price in-store. Correct article usage
the regular
In addition
, there are many copouns
and points Correct your spelling
compounds
coupons
colours
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
avaibale
which can Correct your spelling
available
be redeem
Change the verb form
be redeemed
while
checking out. Hence
, in this
way
Add a comma
way,
people
who buy things online are able to save money
.
To conclude
, Although
electronic shopping may dissatisfied
Change the verb form
dissatisfy
people
beacuse
of Correct your spelling
because
low
quality, it helps to save Correct pronoun usage
its low
the
Correct article usage
apply
time
and money
. Therefore
pros of online purchase
Fix the agreement mistake
purchases
Correct your spelling
outweigh
outweight
the consCorrect your spelling
outweigh
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that your essay has a clear logical structure. Your introduction should concisely present the topic and your stance, followed by body paragraphs that each contain one main idea with sufficient development. Finally, a conclusive paragraph should summarize your points and restate your position in a clear manner.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present but can be more clearly articulated. Make sure the introduction sets out the essay's purpose and your viewpoint succinctly. The conclusion should effectively summarize your points without introducing new information.
coherence cohesion
While you supported your main points within the body paragraphs, you should strive to provide more detailed examples and further elaboration to strengthen your arguments and to fully engage the reader.
task achievement
You have addressed the task and provided a response that encompasses both the advantages and disadvantages of the topic. To improve, strive for a response that is more complete and exhaustive, ensuring that all parts of the task are covered to a high standard.
task achievement
Your ideas are relevant but could benefit from being more fully expanded upon to show how they comprehensively respond to the question. Clear progression of ideas will enhance the clarity of your argument.
task achievement
Providing specific examples that are fully developed will enhance your argument. Use these examples to directly support your points and to showcase the relevance and depth of your analysis.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example