International tourism has brought enormous benefit to many places. At the same time, there is concern about its impact on local inhabitants and the enviroment. Do the disadvantages of International tourism outweight the advantages?

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Whilst it is believed that globalization has provided dozens of new
tourism
-related opportunities for many
countries
around the world, implications
such
as mass immigration and pollution are causing a salient concern for the locals.
However
, I think the positive payback of
tourism
will shadow its drawbacks in total. The first eminent benefit of
tourism
is the amount of additional revenue generated by those
countries
due to
touristic activities. The
tourism
field constitutes a major part of the annual gross domestic product of some
countries
like Turkiye, France, and Greece where the
tourism
sector contributes 10% of the annual revenue,
thus
lifting up the economies of these
countries
.
Besides
contributing to a country's budget,
tourism
increases the diversity of certain regions without disrupting the pristine condition of the surroundings.
For example
, alongside monetary value, tourists may
also
bring cultural
as well as
ethnic diversities to wherever they travel. Despite these advantages,
tourism
can
also
be viewed as a formidable threat by certain people who are
also
proponents of conservative values, but
also
some evident reasons occurring in the World. It is worth noting that not every
tourist
is tidy and precautious enough to clean up before leaving the
tourist
destinations. Especially in France, areas adjacent to the Eiffel Tower are heavily polluted by tourists, ultimately impeding
tourist
activities. Another issue with
tourism
has started recently and it turned out as an unbearable weight for certain first-world
countries
.
For instance
, dozens of people with
tourist
visas are travelling around the world to apply for immigration. Since the
tourism
sector is spoiled with an easier visa application, people without a proper background can now enter the
countries
and
consequently
, bring about disruptions in the demographics of
countries
like Canada and Germany. In conclusion,
although
international
tourism
is infamous for being the reason behind uncontrolled migrations
as well as
pollution of
tourist
destinations, I contend that its positive impact on local economies, reputation, and cultural diversities of
countries
is paramount and outweighs its drawbacks.
Submitted by orkhanshamil on

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task achievement
Your essay presents arguments for both sides of the issue, which is commendable. However, the response could be more fully developed by expanding on each point with further detail and examples, which would better illustrate and support your argument.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of your essay is fairly clear, but the transition between ideas could be smoother. Use a wider range of cohesive devices to improve the flow between sentences and paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present but could be more impactful. Ensure that your thesis statement in the introduction is clear and directly addresses the question, and that your conclusion effectively summarizes the key points made throughout the essay without introducing new ideas.
task achievement
You've included relevant examples to support your main points, but they could be more specific and directly linked to the impacts on local inhabitants and the environment. Use concrete statistics, studies, or cases that clearly demonstrate the advantages and disadvantages of international tourism.
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