Nowadays people like to use new electronic equipment. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

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Electronic
devices
have
spreaded
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spread
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fastly
Rephrase
fast
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and begun to
utilizing
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utilise
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wide
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a wide
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range of
field
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fields
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from healthcare assistance to navigation. At
this
point
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point,
show examples
a question comes to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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minds
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mind
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: whether the
use
of electronic
devises
Replace the word
devices
show examples
is
Verb problem
apply
show examples
a positive amendment? It can be easily stated that using electronic
devices
makes people’s lives easier by helping on the road and monitoring general health
status
without a licenced medical worker.
Firstly
, there are numerous disparate applications which are designed to help drivers in order to provide the shortest and
less
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least
show examples
congested route, and thanks to these applications people may access their destination in
shorter
Correct article usage
a shorter
show examples
time
. Imagine a man who wants to reach his meeting in
time
, when
this
man
control
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controls
show examples
the
traffic
status
via an app
in
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on
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his mobile phone, he may change his route
according to
the data
aboout
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about
traffic
congestion.
Comparison
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In comparison
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with another man who does not
use
any
devise
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device
show examples
to check the
traffic
status
, former men
is
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are
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likely to reach
destination
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their destination
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in
time
and save
his
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apply
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time
.
To sum up
, with
a
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an
show examples
electronic
devise
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device
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which is easy to
use
and common, people may make their life more comfortable and may keep themselves
some
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in some
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unintended
situationd
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situations
situation
like heavy
traffic
.
On the other hand
, with the usage of
a
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an
show examples
electronic device like a
smart watch
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smartwatch
show examples
individuals may monitor their pulse and body temperature themselves. Let’s think about, a woman who has
a
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apply
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heart disease and irregular heart
rhytm
Correct your spelling
rhythm
rhythms
, if
this
woman
use
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uses
show examples
a
smart watch
Correct your spelling
smartwatch
show examples
, she can
be check
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check
show examples
her pulse and once she
realize
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realizes
show examples
an unexpected change, she can contact
with
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apply
show examples
her doctor earlier than
a
Correct article usage
the
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patient who does not
use
Add an article
a smart
show examples
smart watch
Correct your spelling
smartwatch
show examples
.
Furthermore
, since the watch records the data,
doctor
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the doctor
a doctor
show examples
may utilize
from
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apply
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the data
while
planning the treatment or medication. To wrap up, some technological
devices
may provide crucial information for doctors and patients, as well.
To conclude
,
usage
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the usage
show examples
of new
electronical
Correct your spelling
electronic
equipments
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equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
show examples
provides variable benefits to
people
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people's
show examples
lifes
Correct your spelling
lives
show examples
.
Devices
which bring different route options to drivers and monitor
the
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their
show examples
health
status
may play
a
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an
show examples
elementary role in
individuals
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individuals'
individual's
show examples
life
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lives
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. As long as
the
Correct article usage
apply
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companies or governments increase their investment
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
electronic
devices
, people’s
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
may become more comfortable .
Submitted by ilaydailday on

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Your opinion

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • technological progress
  • innovation
  • efficiency
  • environmental issues
  • electronic waste
  • digital literacy
  • accessibility
  • over-dependence
  • face-to-face interactions
  • economic growth
  • consumerism
  • planned obsolescence
  • financial stability
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