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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main feature and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main feature and make comparisons where relevant.
#proportion #population #three #countries #summarise #information #feature #comparisons
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The given line graph illustrates the information about
Use synonyms
proportion
Add an article
the proportion
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 of
people
Use synonyms
 aged 65 and over in 3 different
country
Change to a plural noun
countries
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Japan
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,
Sweden
Use synonyms
 and
Use synonyms
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
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 in the period of 100 years between 1940 and 2040.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen from
Correct article usage
the line
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line
Correct article usage
the line
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 graph
proportion
Use synonyms
 of
Correct article usage
the population
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population
Correct article usage
the population
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 aged 65 and over in
Japan
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,
Sweden
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 and
Use synonyms
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
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 has
Correct article usage
an increase
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Correct article usage
an increase
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Replace the word
increased
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increase
Replace the word
increased
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 trend. And in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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2040
Japan
Use synonyms
 has the most
proportion
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 of
people
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 aged 65 and over and
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USA
Correct article usage
the USA
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 has the least. in 1940
Japan
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has
Wrong verb form
had
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 the
least
Correct word choice
lowest
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proportion
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 and
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USA
Correct article usage
the USA
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has
Wrong verb form
had
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 the most but in the period of 80 years between 1940 and 2020
Japan
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 and
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USA
Correct article usage
the USA
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tends
Wrong verb form
tended
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 to increase but
increases
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 little and
Sweden
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 increased sharply in the
proportion
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 of
people
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 aged 65 and over. In 2020
Sweden
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 rose to the top in the
proportion
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 of
people
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 aged 65 and over
while
Linking Words
Japan
Use synonyms
 was still the least. From 2020 to 2040 all 3
country
Change to a plural noun
countries
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 still
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 but
Japan
Use synonyms
 increased sharply in the
proportion
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 aged 65 and over and rose to the top
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Vocabulary: Replace the words proportion, people, japan, sweden, usa with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 7 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 6 times.
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