Nowadays, many people use the Internet to get medical advice instead of going to see a doctor. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

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In the contemporary era, an increasing number of individuals are turning to the Internet for medical guidance rather than seeking traditional consultations in hospitals or clinics. Two factors drive

this

trend, and I firmly believe it represents a negative evolution.

Firstly

, one of the primary reasons for the growing reliance on online medical advice is convenience. With the widespread availability of smartphones, tablets, and computers, people can easily access

health

advice from anywhere at any time. It is often quicker and more convenient to search for information online than to make an appointment, and travel to the doctor’s office, particularly for those with busy schedules.

Additionally

, another reason why some individuals may opt for online medical guidance is

due to

the privacy and confidentiality it offers.

This

allows them to seek advice on sensitive

health

issues without revealing their identity or personal details to a medical professional.

This

can be especially important for topics that citizens may find stigmatized or shameful,

such

as mental

health

or sexual

health

however

, in my view,

this

is a concerning development because the internet, in its current state, lacks the capability to consider the implicit

health

conditions of patients. Medical diagnosis directly coming from cyberspace can lead people to think their

health

problems are far more serious than they really are.

For example

, if citizens search for “headache or migraine reasons” on Google, there will be results regarding brain cancer or aneurysm, which cause unnecessary concern.

This

occurs because the search algorithms on the internet are not equipped to take into account other factors contributing to individuals' symptoms. A patient searching for “headache reasons” may have an implicit

health

condition like dehydration as the main reason. In conclusion, nowadays, people are opting for online medical services rather than visiting the doctor. The reasons for

this

are convenience and privacy,

however

, I believe

this

is not a positive evolution, as it may provide the correct treatment for their problems.

Submitted by xiaoruoling7 on Thu Nov 30 2023

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coherence cohesion

Ensure smooth transition between ideas. Paragraphs should flow logically but also connect seamlessly using transitional phrases. Varying your connectors and checking your paragraph structure for fluidity will increase the coherence of your work.

coherence cohesion

Introduction and conclusion are crucial for framing your essay. They must be clearly distinguishable and encapsulate the essence of your argument. Strive for stronger opening statements and more definitive conclusions.

coherence cohesion

Back up each point with relevant, detailed examples. While you have provided examples in your essay, to achieve a higher score, try to be more specific and detailed in how you support your points.

task achievement

Fully address all parts of the task. Your response must cover all aspects of the question to achieve a higher rating. Make sure to answer all parts of the question equally and avoid focusing more heavily on one part than another.

task achievement

Clarify your main ideas and develop them fully. While you introduced various ideas, there is room to delve deeper into your points, explaining and expanding on them to better demonstrate comprehensive knowledge of the subject.

task achievement

Use more specific examples to substantiate your points. The essay would benefit from real-life cases or data to support claims, particularly when discussing the disadvantages of seeking medical advice online.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

324 words

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Nowadays, many people use the Internet to get medical advice instead of going to see a doctor. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

In many developing countries there is a problem with declining quality of air and water from both industry and construction. What measure can be taken to prevent this?

Nowadays, most people try to balance between work and other part of lives. Unfortunately, not many achieve this balance. What problems does this cause? Can you suggest some solutions to this issue?

It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

Some schools are very strict about their school uniforms and the appearance of their pupils, while other schools have a very relaxed dress code. What are the advantages and disadvantages of children of having a school uniform?

Some people say that in all levels of educations, from primary schools to universities, too much time is spent on learning facts and not enough on learning practical skills. Do you agree or disagree?