In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?

#countries #phone #cellphone #apps #development

Nowadays, Technology is becoming more popular day by day and at the same time proves so beneficial to every person in society. With so many latest devices, Mobile

phones

are the best of them and now become a need of everyone's life because they facilitate them in so many different aspects. I personally appreciate the benefits of cell

phones

Furthermore

, Now mobile

phones

contain so many online

payment

applications which facilitate human beings so much like by having

this

opportunity people don't need to carry money with them, They can simply pay with their

phones

with one click and the biggest benefit of

this

is feeling of safe from theft by not carrying

cash

in pockets. At the same time, Some people do not like to pay with their phone because paying online

they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

does not feel good or you can say they do not feel an attachment to the goods, They buy by paying online so they always like to pay with

cash

Moreover

, Mobile

payment

poses some security risks as well and I am not against of

cash

payment

method. If someone feels good and contented by buying with

cash

then

it's totally fine but people cannot deny the benefits of online

payment

methods.

Thus

, With the aforementioned arguments in favour of the online

payment

method now, We can say that the good points of the online

payment

method outweigh the drawbacks of

cash

methods which is not too dire to ignore.

Submitted by ramisha.ejaz23 on Thu Nov 30 2023

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coherence cohesion

The essay lacks a clear and logical structure, making it difficult for the reader to follow the progression of arguments. Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and the supporting sentences relate directly to this main idea. Use transition words to guide the reader through your points.

coherence cohesion

An introduction and a conclusion are present but could be strengthened. The introduction should more clearly outline the points that will be addressed in the essay, and the conclusion should succinctly summarize the main points made without introducing new ideas.

coherence cohesion

Your main points need better support and development. Each paragraph should introduce one clear main idea and follow with specific and relevant examples or evidence to back it up. Aim for depth rather than breadth in your development of ideas.

task achievement

The response touches on the advantages and disadvantages of mobile payments but lacks a clear position and detailed analysis. The task requires you to decide whether the advantages or disadvantages are more significant, and present arguments and examples to support your view.

task achievement

The essay contains ideas relevant to the topic, but they could be more comprehensive and presented in a clearer manner. Structure your essay with clear topic sentences, and develop each paragraph with focused arguments rather than general statements.

task achievement

Include more specific examples to effectively illustrate your points. Rather than making broad assertions about the benefits and drawbacks of mobile payments, give concrete instances where these benefits or drawbacks have been observed.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

244 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

convenience
safety
security
time-saving
cashless transactions
dependence on technology
privacy concerns
accessibility issues
financial vulnerability

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In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

In some countries, people are purchasing fewer new items and more second-hand goods. What are the reasons for this? Is this positive or negative trend?

Write about the following topic. The internet has greatly increased our access to information. To what extent do you think this is a good thing? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Developing countries require help offered by international organization to ensure healthy and sustainable development. Some people think that financial aids is important. Other believe that practical aid and advice is more important. Discuss both these views and give youw own opinion.

Caring for children is very important for our society. Therefore all mother's and father's should take a child care training course. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that the only important thing in life is his or her work. Without a successful career, life is meaningless. To what extent do you agree or disagree?