Many people choose natural healing methods, such as acupuncture and massage therapy to recover from illness. Others prefer to use pharmaceutical drugs prescribe by their doctor for their aliments.

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Choosing an effective way of

medicine

Use synonyms

is crucial for many people. Proper

medicine

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treatment brings a person in proper mental and physical conditions which are necessary in terms of social and work adaptivity

Although

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some individuals claim natural treatments

such

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as herbal or massage are preferable, I strongly believe that official

medicine

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is much more effective because of the certain effect and less

time

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recovering. The certain and predictable effect of healing methods is tremendously important for people. It is because individuals must be confident, they are healthy in the nearest

time

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for society contribution and ability to work.

Whereas

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using alternative kinds of

medicine

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has been widespread in recent times, only official pharma investigations

such

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as penicillin and vaccination increased the average human life expectancy.

For example

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, the average life rate was only 23 years 2000 years ago, 26 in the medieval centuries, 26 at the beginning of 18 century and 72 years in the present day after creating meaningful pharmaceutical drugs.

Consequently

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, natural healing methods, which have been used during human history are not as effective as the pharmaceutical drugs prescribed by doctors. Another serious reason for choosing the official way of healing

Remove the comma

apply

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is the speed of recovery. Reducing healing

time

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is important for jobs and society.

In other words

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, the absence for a long

time

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in social life can bring people serious losses in terms of money, opportunities and relationships and cannot be allowed.

Hence

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, an effective pharmaceutical treatment helps to avoid

this

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problem.

To sum up

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, it is really important to choose the right way of healing.

Although

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massage or acupuncture can bring relief, the official pharmaceutical drugs cope with illness more effectively and fast which is confirmed by statistical investigations and human history.

tarasovnnSat Dec 02 2023

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coherence cohesion

The essay provides an opinion and some level of development of arguments; however, it requires more elaborate explanations and clearer paragraphing to enhance logical structure.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that the introduction and conclusion are clearly distinguishable from the rest of the essay with strong opening and closing statements respectively. The conclusion should mirror the opinions and summaries discussed in the essay without introducing new arguments.

coherence cohesion

While the essay supports main points, they need to be presented with more detailed examples and explanations. Aim to have a more developed main body of the essay where each paragraph elaborates a single argument with cleary defined examples.

task achievement

The essay addresses the task and presents a position but to achieve higher marks, ensure that all parts of the prompt are equally addressed and that main ideas are expanded upon comprehensively.

task achievement

To clarify and broaden your ideas, include more specific and relevant examples that directly support your arguments. This depth of explanation will contribute to a higher score in task achievement.

task achievement

Task achievement can be improved by fully answering the prompt, ensuring that your ideas are comprehensive and making it explicit how they address the topic. Refrain from making generalized statements without backing them up with focused and detailed examples or reasoning.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

288 words

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Many people choose natural healing methods, such as acupuncture and massage therapy to recover from illness. Others prefer to use pharmaceutical drugs prescribe by their doctor for their aliments.

Your opinion

These dats people are using the internet for shopping, work and to communicate with others without the need for face to face meetings. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Modern people mostly stay at home rather than going outdoors. What are the reasons for this trend? Is this trend good or bad?

It must be a woman who stays at home to care for children. Men are not suited to this kind of work. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

some believe studying alone is better and while some others believe group study is far good. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

some feel that governments should prioritize healthcare instead of other important areas. to what extend do you agree or disagree?