For many people, the reason they work hard is to earn more money. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
These days,
it is clear that
money plays a crucial role in our lives. Therefore
, the main reason to work
hardly
in a particular office or workplace is to generate much more money. I concur that they should lobby with much effort to occupy wealth and live without any financial issues.
It is estimated that almost the entire population of all countries holds certain types of jobs to make a living. I agree with Change the word
hard
this
upward tendency to alleviate financial issues by dedicating themselves to their professions. If they work
hardly
, they can consume meals that they want, and they can purchase commodities that they want to wear in order to boast. Change the word
hard
As a result
of owning these kinds of latest versions of clothes or massive cars, other people
look up to those wealthy humans. Furthermore
, they can tackle their challenges with a lot of funding. To illustrate, in some developed countries, such
as America, there are some celebrities, including Jeff Bezos who is capable of changing a person from their own job to another one due to
their success.
Therefore
, people
should strive to do their work
well. Nevertheless
, I partly disagree that hard work
can lead to serious difficulties, including illness, burning out
, and sleepiness. Change preposition
apply
In other words
, if people
labor
diligently, Change the spelling
labour
this
occasion insists on not sleeping. With any relaxation, people
become intensely sick. To illustrate, in our fast-paced world, hard work
sparks more than 745,000 humans'
deaths. Fix the agreement mistake
human'
Furthermore
, burning out plays an essential role among
any Change preposition
in
diseases
. What I mean by Fix the agreement mistake
disease
this
is that employees are converted into lazy people
by hard work
. Nevertheless
, I have a greater tendency to agree with working hard due to
its myriad benefits.
In conclusion, I agree that people
should work
hard, as I discussed above, but they should not forget the drawbacks of this
circumstance.Submitted by yoqubjonovjamshidbek23 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
You should aim to have a clear central topic within each paragraph. Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that the following sentences elaborate on this. Use cohesive devices effectively to connect your ideas and paragraphs, avoiding overuse or misuse.
task achievement
Make sure you address all parts of the task. Your response must be directly relevant to the prompt and fully elaborate on your viewpoint. Use a range of structures and vocabulary to articulate your ideas clearly and precisely.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!