Scientist agree that people are damaging their health by eating too much junk food. Some people think that the answer to this problem is to educate people. Others think education will not work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Undoubtedly,
todays
world is the world of diversity. We can vividly see that Change to a genitive case
today's
people
have more tendency these days to try new types of almost everything. One
of the most crucuial
things is Correct your spelling
crucial
about
Change preposition
apply
junk
food
which according to
the
scientists could be very harmful Correct article usage
apply
for
our Change the preposition
to
body
. There are two groups among Fix the agreement mistake
bodies
people
, and one
group
believe
that we should train Correct subject-verb agreement
believes
people
, unlike the other group
who
Correct pronoun usage
which
think
Correct subject-verb agreement
thinks
it
public Correct pronoun usage
apply
awarness
is not beneficial.
The first Correct your spelling
awareness
group
interpret that
the fact which is "Correct word choice
apply
juck
Correct your spelling
junk
food
is harmful for
our Change the preposition
to
body
' is
Correct your spelling
as
crytal
clear and Correct your spelling
crystal
majority
of Correct article usage
the majority
people
know about this
fact, but they prefer to ignore it because they do not actually aware of the actual consequences of junk
food
in our body
and organs. They explain that it is Correct article usage
the governments'
governments'
duty to warn Change noun form
government's
costumers
; Correct your spelling
customers
for example
, via attaching labels on the
merchandise packages, or television advertisements.
Correct article usage
apply
On the other hand
, the oponent
Correct your spelling
opponent
group
say it is just waste
of time because no Correct article usage
a waste
one
will be noticed. People
like snacks and junk
food
because it is delicious. In addition
to that, occasionally they consume it during their spare time or when they go to the cinema or theater
. So our ads could not be beneficial for them unless they understand it by experience; Change the spelling
theatre
for example
, imagine you always say to the
society that your Correct article usage
apply
body
is going to be hermed
by eating Correct your spelling
harmed
these
trash. Will they find out it? Correct determiner usage
this
Absoloutely
no, until they or Correct your spelling
Absolutely
one
of their family member experience a devastating situation after over-eating these
Correct determiner usage
this
junk
food
.
As far as I am concerned, government
should tell the Add an article
the government
people
about pros
and cons of Correct article usage
the pros
junk
food
and how could they
harm our Correct pronoun usage
apply
body
in the future. Fix the agreement mistake
bodies
Moreover
, the other way is making the producers of this
industry to increasing
the price of their products. Wrong verb form
increase
As
Change preposition
In
a
conclusion, we will observe Correct article usage
apply
the
decrease Correct article usage
a
of
consumerism of these kinds of snacks in the near future.
Change preposition
in
Overall
, I believe that stating taxs
and huge ads Correct your spelling
taxes
tax
agains
Correct your spelling
against
junk
food
could prevent people
from purchasing those harmful snacks.Submitted by tg.persian on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that the essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea and subsequent sentences should support that idea.
coherence cohesion
Use cohesive devices appropriately to link ideas, paragraphs, and sentences. This includes conjunctions, referencing words, and synonyms to avoid repetition.
task achievement
Address all parts of the task. This means discussing both views presented in the question and providing your own opinion.
task achievement
Develop ideas fully and extend your response with relevant examples that support your points.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.