Some people believe that there should be a fixed punishment for each type of crime. Others, however, argue that the circumstances of an individual crime, and the motivation for committing it, should always be taken into account when deciding on the punishment

#people #punishment #type #crime #circumstances #motivation #account

Primarily

everycrime

Correct your spelling

every crime

everytime

must not be

unpunish

Correct your spelling

unpunished

However

,for

everycrime

Correct your spelling

crime

should be

taken punishments

Verb problem

punished by

show examples

looking at their level of

crime

For instance

,someone stole a suitcase and for

this

government cannot give

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

ten or more

than

Change preposition

apply

show examples

years of prison punishment.

Therefore

I disagree with

this

pointview

Correct your spelling

point

.I'll winder

cooverage

Correct your spelling

coverage

off my opinion in the following essay. Numereous people think that,if

government

Add an article

the government

show examples

will

Verb problem

apply

show examples

put

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

strict

lows

Correct your spelling

laws

show examples

for each type of

crimes

Fix the agreement mistake

crime

show examples

,no one will commit a

crime

everyone will stay away from

commiting

Correct your spelling

committing

crime

Change preposition

show examples

some

ways

Add a comma

ways,

show examples

it's a true to make

this

decision.Probably,it

become

Change the verb form

becomes

show examples

benefial

Correct your spelling

beneficial

Change preposition

for

show examples

country's

Correct article usage

the country's

show examples

respect among other countries. The main reason,why

I'm disagree

Change the verb form

I disagree

show examples

is that,as we know mostly poor

peolpe

Correct your spelling

people

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

who cannot afford their families or haven't got enough money for their

medecine

Correct your spelling

medicine

, commit

a small

Correct the article-noun agreement

small crimes

a small crime

show examples

crimes

such

Correct your spelling

show examples

stolling

a foods

Correct the article-noun agreement

foods

a food

show examples

from markets,or stolling

a suitcases

Correct the article-noun agreement

suitcases

a suitcase

show examples

.For

this

kind of

crimes

Fix the agreement mistake

crime

show examples

environment cannot give

a strong punishments

Correct the article-noun agreement

a strong punishment

strong punishments

show examples

,they can put a fine or

give

Verb problem

apply

show examples

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

15 days in prison and I think it would be enough for them.But,for big and

seriously

Change the word

serious

show examples

crimes

government should put

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

strict punishment,

shuch

Correct your spelling

such

Correct your spelling

show examples

killing or

guard

Wrong verb form

guarding

show examples

thief

Fix the agreement mistake

thieves

show examples

and so on,because

this kind

Fix the agreement mistake

these kinds

show examples

crimes

are worth it.

As a result

,I think every

crime

should be fixed

looking

Change preposition

by looking

show examples

at their level of

crime

and

give

Wrong verb form

giving

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

suitable

punishes

Correct your spelling

punishments

show examples

Submitted by yoqubjonovjamshidbek23 on Sun Dec 03 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

introduction conclusion present

The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion which are necessary components of any essay. Ensure that you introduce the topic clearly and summarize your main points in the conclusion for a well-rounded argument.

logical structure

There are significant issues with the logical structure of your argument. Your essay should have a clear progression of ideas, moving logically from one point to the next with clear paragraphing and use of linking words.

supported main points

While some main points are presented, they need clearer development and support. Consider using more specific examples and explanations to strengthen your arguments.

complete response

Work on fully responding to the task by addressing both views presented in the prompt before providing your own opinion. Ensure that your response directly answers the question asked.

clear comprehensive ideas

Your ideas must be expressed clearly and in a comprehensive manner. Aim to be more precise in conveying your thoughts and avoid overly complex sentences that can make your argument harder to follow.

relevant specific examples

Include relevant and specific examples to support your points. This will add depth to your essay and make your argument more convincing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
43Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

211 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
Historical artifacts should be brought back to their country of origin. To what extend do you agree/disagree?
In contemporary days, the issue of shipping ancient items to their original nations sparked debates. Some advocate bringing back these artifacts for potential benefits, while another disagree with this. Diving deeply and explaining why I agree with repatriation of those objects are the main aim of this essay.
5
band
In the future all cars ,buses and trucks will be driver less.The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driver less vehicles outweigh the disadvantages.
The automobiles we know now will be so different in the future, such as cars, buses and trucks without drivers and inside the cars will be only passengers, no more drivers. I really believe that the future without drivers sounds good. In this essay, I will discuss why I believe that the advantages are over the disadvantages.
6.5
band
Obesity is an ever-growing pandemic that is affecting more and more of the world's population. The number of people who are at risk of serious health problems due to being overweight is increasing. •What is the reason for the growth of the number of overweight people in society? How can this issue be resolved?
Obesity is an increasingly widespread epidemic impacting a growing number of people worldwide. The number of individuals at risk of severe health issues due to being overweight is rising. This essay will discuss about the causes of this phenomenon and give some solutions to tackle this issue.
<4
band
Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree? You should write at least 250 words.
In my opinion, it depends on what poorer countries need to deloveped their country. Some poorer countries need financial aid to slove their poverty and some countries need the supplier. As you can see, during Covid pandemic poorer countries highly need supporting from the rich countries. Thus, some poorer countries need Covid-nineteenth vaccination and medical supply to offer to their people and some need financial aid to support their country economic while they were lockdown so most of the countries affected not only poorer countries. For example: In Cambodia which is the developing country so they need the money flow from the rich countries to support their economic leading to attract investors and consequences to get more potential and opportunity to offering people to get job in order to improve their GDP. Furthermore, they either need supporting from tourism from the rich countries because eighty percent of income comes from tourists so turism is entire part of economy so it i...
5.5
band
There is an increasing trend around the world of married couples deciding not to have children. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for couples who decide to do this.
An increasing number of married couples around the world choosing to remain childless. The main benefits of not having a child for couples are that they can focus on their careers and have more time for themselves. The main drawbacks are that they could not fit into their peers’ group and have no one to look after them when they get old.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Some people believe that there should be a fixed punishment for each type of crime. Others, however, argue that the circumstances of an individual crime, and the motivation for committing it, should always be taken into account when deciding on the punishment

Fully explain your ideas

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

Historical artifacts should be brought back to their country of origin. To what extend do you agree/disagree?

In the future all cars ,buses and trucks will be driver less.The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driver less vehicles outweigh the disadvantages.

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree? You should write at least 250 words.

There is an increasing trend around the world of married couples deciding not to have children. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for couples who decide to do this.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+