Being a celebrity- such as a famous film star or sports personality- brings problems as well as benefits. Do you think that being a celebrity brings more benefits or more problems?
The assumption of being a famous
celebrity
always increased people
’s interest. This
may be because they could take advantage of it, including a better live-stander level as well as
some valuable opportunities. However
, other people
may have opposite opinions. This
essay aims to support the idea that becoming a celebrity
would have more benefits than disadvantages.
Initially
, becoming a superstar would result in less financial concern. For example
, the NBA is the highest-level basketball legend in the world. The lowest annual salary for a normal-level NBA player is around 2.4 million USD, which is an unimaginable number for a middle-class family, not to mention
those people
who struggle with the poverty line. As a result
, if a person could become a sports talent and earn a contrast as a national representative-level athlete, they would at least not have to worry about whether they could afford the groceries. In other words
, they could concentrate on their careers and pursue their own profiles with less stress.
Secondly
, being a celebrity
would provide some unique opportunity, which is valuable for an individual to improve their own skills. It is imaginable that the challenges faced by a file star or professional athlete would be different for an employee who obtains the same routine every day. Those challenges may lead to exhaustion both physically and mentally. For instance
, a professional athlete has to manage their diet while
accepting the hardest training. However
, once the individual learns how to address those stresses, he or she will become more skilled in their own field. Therefore
, they could archive
their target more easily.
In conclusion, becoming a Verb problem
achieve
celebrity
would not only reduce people
's financial stress but also
provide unique opportunities to improve themselves. As a result
, this
essay agrees with the idea that people
could gain more advantages by being celebrities.Submitted by heimli6 on
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task achievement
To achieve higher marks in task achievement, ensure you fully address all parts of the prompt. Your essay would benefit from a more balanced discussion of both benefits and problems of being a celebrity to reflect the comparative nature of the question.
coherence cohesion
While your essay exhibits logical structure, introduction, and conclusion, try to establish a clearer position in the introduction and reiterate it in the conclusion for a stronger impact.
coherence cohesion
Use a wider range of connectives and topic-specific vocabulary to enhance the flow of ideas and exhibit higher language proficiency.
task achievement
Include more detailed and varied examples to illustrate your points. Specific anecdotes or statistics could strengthen the effectiveness of your arguments.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?