Some people say that mobile phones are unnecessary for young group while others find that its useful for younger ones. discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #phones #group #ones

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In today's digital age, there has been ongoing debate regarding whether young

people

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necessarily need mobile

phones

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. Some argue that these devices are not essential for young groups,

while

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others consider

phones

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as a convenient tool for them. In

this

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essay, I will explore both perspectives and present my personal viewpoint. In

this

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fast-paced society,

people

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gradually focus on their own matters

instead

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of caring what happens around them. It is widely agreed that young men and women in

this

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generation seem to be more indifferent because of the invention of cell

phones

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. One significant disadvantage of mobile

phones

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can be addictive. In

this

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materialistic society, plenty of software companies aim to share the market of mobile games in order to gain substantial profit.

As a consequence

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, those corporations tend to develop games that players must stick on the screen for a long time, which can make tons of money by using gamers' addiction.

On the other hand

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, It is believed that young

people

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can utilize mobile

phones

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to achieve academic purposes. With the widespread availability of the Internet, students can effortlessly obtain knowledge online. What is obvious is that young students can take advantage of technology that using their

phones

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combined with the Internet to enhance the efficiency of learning.

Furthermore

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, social

also

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an important matter for teenagers, and it is essential for children to form a deep bond with their friends or classmates.

Consequently

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, cell

phones

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can easily allow them to contact each other after school. In conclusion, it is evident that the young group could be addicted to mobile games but there is

also

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a range of benefits that mobile

phones

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can provide.

Therefore

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, it is crucial that parents and teachers should teach young

people

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to strike a balance between the manner of using technology.

Submitted by seanlin12345 on Sun Dec 03 2023

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Coherence & Cohesion

Ensure logical progression of ideas throughout the essay. Use cohesive devices to better link ideas and paragraphs for a more cohesive argument.

Task Achievement

Expand on the main points with more detailed explanations and relevant examples to fully address the prompt.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

298 words

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Some people say that mobile phones are unnecessary for young group while others find that its useful for younger ones. discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Freashwater has always been a limited resource in some parts of the world. Today, however, growing worldwide demand has made this a global problem. What are the causes of this increased demand, and what measures could governments and individuals take to respond to this problem?

SOME SAYFREE EDUCATIONSOME PEOPLE THINK THAT GOVERNMENT SHOULD PROVIDE FREE EDUCATION AT EVERY LEVEL. HOWEVER, SOME SAY THAT INDIVIDUALS SHOULD PAY FOR THEIR UNIVERSITY EDUCATION. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Billions of dollars are being wasted each year in space research . The money could be better used to improve conditions on earth. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement

Some people believe that it is responsibility of individual to take care of their own health and diet. Others however believe that governments should make sure that their citizens have a healthy diet. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

Many people in poor countries die from diseases that are curable because they cannot afford the medication required. Do you believe that drug companies should make their products available at reduced prices in these countries?