Some people think high school graduates should travel or work for a period of time instead of going directly to study at university. Do the Advantages outweigh disadvantages?
Some individuals support the idea of
traveling
or working before going directly to Change the spelling
travelling
university
to study which is named for Add an article
the university
gap
Add an article
a gap
year
. Gap
year
become more popular in recent years. In my perspective, taking a gap
year
has several advantages for students such
as personal growth, maturity and
Cultural exposure.
To begin
with, deciding on university and discipline can be rough for young people who have just graduated from high school. In this
case, a gap
year
can help them by maturing. To give an example, traveling
a country or the world gives an opinion about life and individual thinking. Change the spelling
travelling
Additionally
, Real-world skills can gained by working and this
might lead to learning to manage finances, communication, and problem-solving. Using these kinds of opportunities right before going to college will have a positive impact on the decision-making process for career and school.
On the one hand, Cultural exposure is the key to thinking out of the box. For instance
, traveling or working helps to become knowledgeable about foreigners and become a more global person which is quite important for being a university student because universities are open to all cultures. Also
, learning other cultures can have different amounts of interest. There are several different cultures which can interest and study.
In conclusion, the concept of a gap
year
emerges as an invaluable bridge between the structured realms of academia and the uncharted territories of personal growth. It serves as a transformative phase, fostering maturity, self-awareness, and a deeper understanding of the world. Through travel and work experiences, individuals not only cultivate practical skills but also
develop a global perspective crucial for thriving in today's interconnected societySubmitted by utkankorkmaz on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
introduction conclusion present
Ensure that your introduction clearly presents the topic and your main argument. The intro in the essay lacks a clear thesis statement outlining the upcoming discussion.
supported main points
Your main points need further development with specific details and examples. Each main point should be expanded with relevant examples or evidence to fully support the argument.
introduction conclusion present
Expand the conclusion to effectively summarize the main points discussed and reinforce your overall argument. The current conclusion is abrupt and does not fully capture the essence of the preceding paragraphs.
complete response
Make sure to answer all parts of the prompt fully. The essay touches on the idea of a gap year, but does not adequately address the comparison of advantages and disadvantages as required by the task.
clear comprehensive ideas
The essay must present clear and comprehensive ideas that are well-developed and logically structured. Consider organizing each paragraph around a single main idea and use connective words to improve the flow of information.
coherence cohesion
Use a wider variety of complex sentence structures and vocabulary to express your ideas more precisely. Aim to avoid overly simple expressions and repetitive sentence beginnings to demonstrate a higher level of English proficiency.
relevant specific examples
Incorporate specific examples and evidence to substantiate your claims. Personal anecdotes, statistics, or findings from reputable sources can enhance the authority of your argument and provide a more compelling narrative.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.