A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#person’s #status #possessions #values #honour #kindness #trust

In today's world people by using more

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apply

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social

network

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networks

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and the internet are becoming more materialistic . So , they pay much more attention to the person's appearance than their

personallity

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personality

. In my

oponion

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opinion

, a person should be aware of considering both sides in her/his life which

i'm

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I'm

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going to discuss in

this

essay.

Firstly

according to

my my personal experience in real life , when

your

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you

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are meeting someone new for the first time your appearance shows your

charecter

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character

. For

instence

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instance

, your outfit or even your

hair style

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hairstyle

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. It should be stylish and clean . So the speaker of your

charecter

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character

first

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the first

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site is the way you look. But it is not

neseccery

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necessary

to wear fancy clothes or accessories.

On the other hand

, If you want to

apeal

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appeal

appear

as a gentleman or

women

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woman

show examples

you must behave correctly. So you have to be nice, well-spoken, kind and

respectfull

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respectful

respectfully

in order to be treated as a high-valued person.

Also

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Also,

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you need to be

trustfull

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trustful

.So the people that are around you can rely on you which seems that few people pay attention to it these days.

Also

, it may cause real

problem

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problems

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and trust issues in relationships.

As a result

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think

sociaty

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society

should consider these both sides rather than being materialistic.Because old-fashioned values

Also

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apply

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are one

the

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of the

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main structures that build

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a humen's

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humen's

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humen

show examples

personallity

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personality

Submitted by amirrezadelghandi3 on Mon Dec 04 2023

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Coherence & Cohesion

Your essay lacks a clear and logical structure, which is essential for the reader to follow your argument effectively. Make sure that your ideas are organized in a logical sequence, using paragraphs to distinguish between the introduction, main body, and conclusion of your text.

Coherence & Cohesion

The presence of an introduction and conclusion is crucial to frame your argument and summarize your main points. Your conclusion appears to be brief and does not effectively summarize the essay's argument. Develop a concise yet informative introduction and a conclusion that reiterates your main points and provides a clear final word on the topic.

Coherence & Cohesion

Your main points are present but require further development and support. Remember to back up each point with relevant examples or explanations. Avoid making generalizations without providing evidence to substantiate your claims.

Task Achievement

The essay partially addresses the prompt, but it could benefit from a more complete response. Ensure that you address all aspects of the question and provide your opinion where it is asked for, particularly in 'to what extent do you agree or disagree' type questions.

Task Achievement

While some ideas are presented, they need to be expressed more clearly and comprehensively. Focus on clarity in your writing, avoiding run-on sentences and ensuring grammatical accuracy. This will help convey your ideas more effectively.

Task Achievement

Providing relevant, specific examples strengthens your argument and demonstrates a clear understanding of the topic. Incorporate examples that are directly related to the prompt to illustrate your points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
25Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

228 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Social status
Material possessions
Old-fashioned values
Honour
Kindness
Trust
Judged
Importance
Traditional
Reflection
Achievements
Hard work
Disregarded
Well-balanced
Meaningful
Cultural norms
Societal norms

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A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Fully explain your ideas

Young people are often influenced in their behaviors by others in the same age group. Some argue that peer pressure is important while others feel it has distinct disadvantages. Do the disadvantages of peer pressure outweigh the advantages?

Millions of people every year move to English-speaking countries such as Australia, Britain or America, in order to study at school, college or university. Why do so many people want to study in English? Why is English such an important international language? Give reasons for your answer.

Some people think that outdoor activities are more beneficial for children’s development than playing computer games. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Students at schools and universities learn far more from lessons with teachers than from other sources (such as the Internet and television). To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that Ebooks and modern technology will totally replace traditional newspaper and magazines to what extent do you agree or disagree.