some children spend hours everyday on smartphones. why is this the case? do you think this is a positive or negative development?
many
children
tend to use
a lot of time on Verb problem
spend
gadget
because it is an Fix the agreement mistake
gadgets
impact
from tecnology
advances. In Correct your spelling
technological
may
opinion, it has negative Correct your spelling
my
development
which is they will become difficult to socialize and get sick because of that.
in modern
Add an article
the modern
era
we live with Add a comma
era,
use
Correct article usage
the use
high
technology because of that it Change preposition
of high
is
an Verb problem
has
impact
to
our generation Change preposition
on
especially
Add the comma(s)
, especially
children
. They do not have ability
to manage their self using Change the article
the ability
gadget
so parents are mature person Fix the agreement mistake
gadgets
have
Change the verb form
has
ability
to control them. Change the article
the ability
However
parents are busy living their daily life so they provide Add a comma
However,
toold
that can accompany their Correct your spelling
tools
children
while
thet
work. Correct your spelling
they
Therefore
, children
spend more time with gadget
. They grow with Fix the agreement mistake
gadgets
tecnology
beside them. Correct your spelling
technology
Tecnology
bring what they need so they tend to Correct your spelling
Technology
use
smartphone everyday
.
There is negative Replace the word
every day
development
such
as difficult
ti Replace the word
difficulty
socialize
with Wrong verb form
socialising
other
. They are used to living with their self so it is difficult for them to interact and communicate Fix the agreement mistake
others
direcly
with other people. They tend to Correct your spelling
directly
individual
and selfish because just busy with Add a missing verb
be individual
themselve
. They feel strange when they are with other people.
Correct your spelling
themselves
However
, it is also
positive
Add an article
a positive
development
. Tecnology
helps Correct your spelling
Technology
children
to develop their motor skill
. Fix the agreement mistake
skills
Tecnology
helps Correct your spelling
Technology
children
to develop their motor skill
. Fix the agreement mistake
skills
Tecnology
encourage Correct your spelling
Technology
children
explore
their ability and capability. Add the particle
to explore
For instance
, my little sister use
Wrong verb form
used
smartphone
to watch Add an article
a smartphone
the smartphone
cartoon
from another country, after that she Fix the agreement mistake
cartoons
capable
Add a missing verb
is capable
about
another Change preposition
of
languange
.
Correct your spelling
language
to sum up
, high tecnology
Correct your spelling
technology
gives
Verb problem
has
impact
Add an article
an impact
for
Change preposition
on
children
so they spend their time for
that. Change preposition
on
Although
, it has negative
Add an article
a negative
impact
but
if used well it can be a positive Remove the conjunction
apply
development
.Submitted by misstiasclassroom on
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coherence cohesion
Focus on ensuring that your essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion that are appropriately linked and clearly stated to guide the reader seamlessly through your argument.
coherence cohesion
Main points require substantiation through relevant examples and evidence. All claims made should be supported by specifics; this was lacking in some aspects of your response.
task achievement
A complete response entails a thorough discussion of all parts of the task, displaying a well-developed position that is supported by specific, relevant examples. Your discussion needs to include both the reasons for the situation and clearly articulated views on the positives and negatives of the development, which must be backed up with specific examples or evidence. Additionally, it should directly address the question's components to show a full understanding and engagement with the task.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?