Some people think that the best way to stay fit us by joining a gym while other think doing everyday exercise such as walking and other is sufficient discuss both views and opinions

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Undoubtedly, in

this

Linking Words

modern era, everyone wants to become mentally and physically fit by joining a

gym

Use synonyms

or doing other

activities

Use synonyms

However

Linking Words

, some people believe that the best way to maintain fitness is by joining a

gym

Use synonyms

whereas

Linking Words

others deem that regular

activities

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

as walking or climbing stairs are more beneficial. In the upcoming paragraphs, I will hash out both aspects and give a logical conclusion. On the one hand, several factors are associated with it, but the main benefits of joining a

gym

Use synonyms

are professional guidance and a structured workout. To illustrate, nowadays individuals are suffering from obesity, with

this

Linking Words

, they prefer to join a

gym

Use synonyms

where they can get guidance from professional

gym

Use synonyms

trainers

such

Linking Words

as they can make

a diet plans

Correct the article-noun agreement

a diet plan

diet plans

show examples

for others

as well as

Linking Words

they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

suggest them sorts of exercises to lose weight and they

also

Linking Words

help the masses in their workout because they will become the member of a

gym

Use synonyms

Apart from

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

, individuals get motivation from others to do

exercise

Use synonyms

For instance

Linking Words

, a survey was conducted which concluded that nearly 90 per cent of people join a

gym

Use synonyms

yearly to maintain their body in a particular shape.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, there are a number of advantages to doing regular

activities

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

as walking or climbing stairs. First and foremost, if folks do everyday

exercise

Use synonyms

they can get the psychological benefits from outdoor

activities

Use synonyms

. To explain, they can get a high amount of fresh oxygen and air which

further

Linking Words

boosts their energy level as well they will not suffer from any health issues.

Moreover

Linking Words

, it is

also

Linking Words

a convenient method to

exercise

Use synonyms

Thus

Linking Words

, not only it is convenient, but

also

Linking Words

it is

cost-effective

Add an article

a cost-effective

show examples

method because if people join a

gym

Use synonyms

they have to pay membership costs and travelling costs.

While

Linking Words

, if they do everyday

exercise

Use synonyms

they can save

their

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

money from the

gym

Use synonyms

To conclude

Linking Words

although

Linking Words

both help to improve human health and play a crucial role in our

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

, I believe that having a balance between both is essential to maintain in our

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

svmaibcamaibsTue Dec 05 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

introduction conclusion presence

Make sure your introduction and conclusion are clearly distinguishable and add value to your essay. The introduction should set the stage for the discussion, and the conclusion should uniquely summarize your viewpoints without introducing new information.

coherence logical structure

While your essay presents a logical structure, you should focus on creating stronger topic sentences that clearly establish the main idea for each paragraph. Also, consider using a wider range of cohesive devices to show the relationships between ideas more precisely.

supported main points

Support your main points with more detailed and specific examples. These examples should directly reinforce your arguments and be relevant to the question. Avoid making broad statements without backing them with concrete evidence or examples.

complete response

Ensure you fully respond to all parts of the task. Your essay should cover both sides of the argument comprehensively and end with a clear opinion. You have addressed both views to a satisfactory level, but there's room for deeper exploration of each perspective.

clear comprehensive ideas

Your ideas are mostly clear, but they could be expressed more comprehensively. Work on elaborating your points further to convey a thorough understanding of the topic. Consider exploring the implications and nuances of the arguments you present.

relevant specific examples

You've provided some examples, but they could be more specific and directly related to the points you're making. Use relevant illustrations from real-life experiences, studies or known facts to make your essay more persuasive and informative.

15
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

343 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
Some people think that formal education should start for children as early as possibl. While others think that it should not start until 7 years of age. Discuss both views and give your opinio.
A considerable amount of people think that at an early age, for example, children should start getting an education while, on the other hand, some people think it should not begin till the age of 7 years. According to me, it is better for children to get an education from an early age therefore, they can get familiar with the education system at an early age.
7
band
It can be difficult for small local shops to compete with large supermarkets and with on-line shops. How does this affect local communities? What could be done to improve this situation?
It is not uncommon for small local shops to compete with chains of supermarkets and online shops. I believe that this may cause a decrease in the local shops' total amount of earnings, but local shops have some advantages over other types of shops and I believe they could promote them in order to solve the problem.
8
band
some people say that the bicycle is a good means of transport. Others say that the bicycle has many disadvantages. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reason for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience
The debate surrounding the merits and drawbacks of bicycles as a mode of transportation has gained prominence in recent years. Proponents assert that bikes offer a plethora of advantages, whereas critics highlight their disadvantages. This essay will delve into both perspectives before articulating my own viewpoint.
6.5
band
It is more important for schoolchildren to learn about local history than world history. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Learning history has always been significant for enhancing children's awareness. While some people believe that students should only be taught about national history as it is more crucial for their development, others argue that the advantages of learning world history are more evident. This essay aims to shed light on both perspectives before ultimately concluding that learning about both local and global history is of paramount importance.
8
band
In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advatantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?
It is believed that almost all transports will be upgraded to autopilot in the future. People will be able to travel as passengers in the vehicle. I think the numerous advantages of a driverless car outweigh its disadvantages.

Some people think that the best way to stay fit us by joining a gym while other think doing everyday exercise such as walking and other is sufficient discuss both views and opinions

Some people think that formal education should start for children as early as possibl. While others think that it should not start until 7 years of age. Discuss both views and give your opinio.

It can be difficult for small local shops to compete with large supermarkets and with on-line shops. How does this affect local communities? What could be done to improve this situation?

some people say that the bicycle is a good means of transport. Others say that the bicycle has many disadvantages. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reason for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

It is more important for schoolchildren to learn about local history than world history. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advatantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?