Some scientist think that there are intelligent life forms on others planets and messages should be sent to contact them. Other scientist think it is a bad idea and would be dangerous. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
During past decades there
was
Wrong verb form
has been
show examples
arguable point
that is
there any live
creature
Fix the agreement mistake
creatures
show examples
in
this
solar system like
humans
recently space departure in
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
confirmed that and showed some evidence so
scientist
Fix the agreement mistake
scientists
show examples
offered that we can send a
massege
Correct your spelling
message
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
them and see what happens but another group of scientists said that if we do
this
we are facing our annihilation .in
this
essay we discuss both views .
Firstly
,many
scientist
Change to a plural noun
scientists
show examples
used to say that the only alive creatures in
solar
Add an article
the solar
a solar
show examples
system with intellectual
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
humans
and
alliens
Correct your spelling
aliens
are not real creatures but
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
many countries confirmed that there are
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
this
planet
Add the comma(s)
, therefore,
show examples
therefore
scientist offered that
lets
Wrong verb form
let
show examples
send the
massege
Correct your spelling
message
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
them and make contact with them they believed that they
problay
Correct your spelling
probably
like
humans
and they have
ability
Change the article
the ability
show examples
to understand
humans
and they believed probably they are waiting for us to make the
first
move .
On the other
hand
Add a comma
hand,
show examples
many scientists believe that maybe there like us and
concerned
Add a missing verb
are concerned
show examples
about
humans
too , if we make the
first
move they probably think that we want to
masscare
Correct your spelling
massacre
them and they begin to be worried and assemble alien armies for war between planets . There is no doubt that
humans
are
greatest
Correct article usage
the greatest
show examples
creatures
bit
Correct your spelling
but
show examples
what if and only if aliens have better technologies and armies
we
Correct word choice
than we
show examples
made our crave with our hands , we face our annihilation. In conclusion ,
essay
Correct determiner usage
this essay
show examples
believes that we should make the
first
move as we know there is
quote
Add an article
a quote
the quote
show examples
that if you want to be a good runner
first
you should run , new things
were
Wrong verb form
are
show examples
always stressful but the moment
first
born man on planet earth discovered how we make fire on planet earth he life was so easier.
Submitted by hoomajkzhomaei on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
The essay does not demonstrate a clear logical structure. Ideas are not presented in a coherent manner, and transitions between points are not smooth, making it challenging for the reader to follow the progression of the argument. To improve, ensure that each main point is introduced, explained, and concluded in a separate paragraph, using linking phrases to smoothly transition between them.
coherence cohesion
An introduction and a conclusion are present, but they are not clearly defined or developed. The introduction should clearly present the topic and a thesis statement, outlining your position or intention in writing. The conclusion should summarize the main points discussed and restate your opinion or findings. These elements need to be more distinct and well-crafted to guide the reader through your essay.
coherence cohesion
Main points require improved support with specific examples and explanations. When presenting an argument or viewpoint, it is crucial to back it up with evidence or clear reasoning. Aim to provide concrete examples or references to studies and expert opinions to strengthen your arguments.
task achievement
The essay only partially addresses the task. Key aspects of the prompt, such as discussing both views thoroughly and providing a reasoned opinion, are not fully developed. To enhance task achievement, ensure that both perspectives are equally elaborated, and each is supported with examples or arguments. Your own opinion should be clear and consistently maintained throughout the essay.
task achievement
Ideas are stated but are not always clear or comprehensive. To improve clarity, focus on expressing each idea distinctly and expanding on each with sufficient detail. The use of clear topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph can help in outlining the main idea to be discussed.
task achievement
The use of relevant and specific examples to support your points is lacking. Incorporating detailed examples that are directly related to the topic can significantly enhance the depth and persuasiveness of your argument. To achieve this, consider researching the topic beforehand and including factual information or hypothetical scenarios that closely tie in with your main points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: