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Writing Samples
Band 4

The costs of international travel are decreasing and tourism is growing. Do you believe that the advantages of increasing tourism outweigh its disadvantages?

#costs #travel #tourism
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Over the
last
 two or three decades,
tourism
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the tourism
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 industry has been improvised
to
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apply
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around the world.
As a result
, travel expenses are affordable and
this
 industry
also
 increases. I think
this
 phenomenon has more benefits than drawbacks.
This
 essay will discuss it briefly
for
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in
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 the subsequent paragraphs. There are main imperative benefits
Change preposition
to that
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that
Correct determiner usage
the
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 growing travel industry. One of the main advantages is that
tourism
 can play a crucial role in the country's economy that
improvised
Verb problem
improves
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 the infrastructure. People are able to get all the essential amenities from that. Another merit is that folk's earnings will be improved which means their standard of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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living can grow
by
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through
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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tourism
 because
tourist
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tourists
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 buy and accommodate
in
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apply
show examples
local places and products too.
For example
, India gets more benefits from
tourism
,
therefore
, they can invest huge
amount
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amounts
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 of money to develop the nation's
such
 as infrastructure development. I agree that
this
 phenomenon has more merits. There are some drawbacks. One of the main disadvantages is that natural resources might be diminished
,
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apply
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 because a bulk amount of
traveler
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traveller
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use
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uses
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 all those in some
place
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places
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where
Correct word choice
that
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 already have scarcity
problem
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problems
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 like water. Another demerit is that pollution could be increased,
visitor
Fix the agreement mistake
visitors
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 like to visit all places around the country
while
 they use vehicles,
thus
,
pollution
Correct article usage
the pollution
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 ratio will increase dramatically.
For instance
, India suffers
pollution
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from pollution
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issue
Fix the agreement mistake
issues
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 tremendously since it has improved their
tourism
 field. In conclusion,
tourism
 is the inevitable sector in
country's
Correct article usage
a country's
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economy
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economic
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 contribution.
This
 can improve people's
life
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lives
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 and
economy
Correct article usage
the economy
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 undoubtedly,
therefore
, I believe that
this
 trend has more merits that outweigh demerits.
Submitted by reanudeepan on

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coherence cohesion
Develop clear paragraphs with topic sentences, coherence and logical progression. Use a range of linking words and organize your ideas effectively to enhance readability.
task achievement
Conclusively address the essay prompt, making sure to include a thorough response that covers all parts of the task. Present a balanced view with well-developed arguments, supported by specific examples.
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