IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people want governments to spend money looking for life on other planets. Others, however, think this is a waste of public money when there are so many problems on earth. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.

Some
people
Use synonyms
 think that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
governments should spend public money to explore the possibilities for life on other
planets
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
 some support
this
Linking Words
 opinion, others are against it. These opinions have their considerations. In the current global climate change situation, where the
Earth
Use synonyms
's temperature is rapidly getting hotter, water levels
increase
Wrong verb form
are increasing
show examples
, and natural disasters have occurred more often,
this
Linking Words
 may make some
people
Use synonyms
 question whether
this
Linking Words
 planet will still be suitable for us to live in the upcoming years. Knowing that, and
also
Linking Words
 the fact that the galaxy is boundless, where there may be other habitable
planets
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 out there for us, some
people
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 think that spending money to explore the possibilities for life on other
planets
Use synonyms
 might actually seem like a good long-term investment for all humanity rather than a waste. But
this
Linking Words
 takes an enormous amount of
resources
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.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, some
people
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 think that
those
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
 problems we
found
Wrong verb form
find
show examples
 on
Earth
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 are not completely unresolvable. Preserving
Earth
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 by consecutively reforestation in all countries, cleaning the ocean, resorting to sustainable
resources
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 and energy, and maintaining a healthy food chain. These are doable actions, but
needs
Correct subject-verb agreement
need
show examples
resources
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 and unanimous agreement from all countries and parties to do so. So some
people
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 think that rather than spending the
resources
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 needed for exploring the other
planets
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, which the result is still uncertain, the money should be redirected to save the
earth
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 first. Considering both views, I believe that focusing on saving the
Earth
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 is a much more sensible decision. We can not know whether we would find another planet,
This
Linking Words
 is where we live now, and by doing nothing to save the
earth
Use synonyms
, we might not even have a planet to live in.

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task achievement
Enhance the clarity of your arguments by providing specific examples or evidence to support your points. For instance, mention specific countries' initiatives on climate change to strengthen your argument about focusing resources on Earth.
coherence and cohesion
Improve the logical flow by more clearly connecting your ideas between paragraphs. Consider adding transition phrases that highlight the contrast between the two viewpoints more explicitly.
task achievement
Make sure to directly address opposing viewpoints in your conclusion. This can enhance the strength of your argument and clarify your position.
task achievement
You present a clear stance on the issue, advocating for prioritizing Earth's problems over extraterrestrial exploration. This clarity in opinion is commendable.
coherence and cohesion
Your introduction effectively lays out the topic and the two contrasting views, setting a solid foundation for your discussion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • unprecedented opportunities
  • extraterrestrial
  • satisfy human curiosity
  • practical benefits
  • inspiring goal
  • testament to human ambition
  • pursuit of knowledge
  • critics argue
  • imprudent
  • plague Earth
  • immediate attention
  • allocated for
  • environmental conservation
  • well-being
  • quality of life
  • balanced approach
  • advancements
  • benefits for humanity
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