Many people have a close relationship with their pets. These people treat their birds, cats, or other animals as members of their family. In your opinion, are such relationships good? Why or why not? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Nowadays, almost every person prefers to keep a pet at their home and share a special bond with them. Few of us handle them with so much love that
they
Correct pronoun usage
we
show examples
treat
their
Correct pronoun usage
our
show examples
pets as
their
Correct pronoun usage
our
show examples
family member. In my opinion,
this
is the right approach towards them as they equally need care and affection
same
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
as humans,
however
, it should not be forgotten that animals can turn into danger at times. There are numerous reasons why people share
such
special
Correct article usage
a special
show examples
attachment with their pets.
Firstly
, spending valuable time with animals can turn into the best source of joy and happiness. They have the purest
soul
Fix the agreement mistake
souls
show examples
on
this
planet and undoubtedly if treated well they can turn into stress
buster
Fix the agreement mistake
busters
show examples
for us.
Secondly
, pets can teach our kids a sense of responsibility and can act as a protector for them. To exemplify, a child can learn to take care of them by timely feeding them,
taking
Correct word choice
and taking
show examples
them for a walk and
such
activities will surely build them up into
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
responsible child in future.
Furthermore
, in respect of treating them like a family member, they are as equivalent as a child and should not be
illtreated
Correct your spelling
ill treated
show examples
in
anyways
Correct your spelling
any way
show examples
.
Moreover
, they are the most trustworthy creatures on earth and can turn into a safeguard for humans in difficult situations.
However
, it is crucial to understand that their behaviour with everyone might not be the same and
thus
, it is necessary to keep others protected and safe.
For instance
, many a time people take their dogs for a walk without a leash which can risk other’s
life
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lives
show examples
.
To conclude
, a well-trained pet can
also
turn into danger sometimes,
nevertheless
, it is good to form a family relationship with them as they are the most loyal and lovable
creature
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creatures
show examples
on
this
earth.
Submitted by duongntt.tld on

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coherence cohesion
Make sure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea, and use cohesive devices to link your ideas and arguments effectively.
coherence cohesion
While your introduction and conclusion are present and generally clear, work on the effectiveness of your thesis statement and final thought to reinforce your standpoint.
coherence cohesion
Support your main points with more specific examples and explanations that are directly related to the question, to enhance the clarity and depth of your argument.
task achievement
Ensure that you fully address all parts of the task with detailed and relevant points that answer the question directly, providing a balanced view where appropriate.
task achievement
Strive to express complex ideas precisely and with greater clarity, avoiding vagueness or overly general statements.
task achievement
Include more specific examples to illustrate your points, ensuring they are relevant to the question and contribute to your overall argument.

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