IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

It will be better to have wide use of driverless cars for individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement?

As
the
Correct article usage
apply
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technology
development
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develops
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, the number of
Use synonyms
driveless
Correct your spelling
driverless
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cars
Use synonyms
are
Change the verb form
is
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 increasing in the market and
society
Use synonyms
. Some
people
Use synonyms
 consider that
Use synonyms
driveless
Correct your spelling
driverless
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cars
Use synonyms
 have certain potential risks.
However
Linking Words
, I think the car should be used widely in
society
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,
it
Correct word choice
as it
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 has benefits for individuals and
society
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. First of all, the problem of congestion and unemployment are still serious
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
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in
Change preposition
apply
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nowadays. If
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Use synonyms
driveless
Correct your spelling
driverless
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cars
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are become
Change to the active voice
become
have become
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 popular in the future, some manufacturers are more likely to produce more
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driveless
Correct your spelling
driverless
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cars
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 and there
are
Wrong verb form
will be
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 more
cars
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 appear on the road. So,
this
Linking Words
 condition would cause a jam on the road and the problem will not be solved well.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, when
the
Correct article usage
apply
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cars
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 appear,
people
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 who are unable to drive
car
Correct article usage
a car
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 may
be benefited
Wrong verb form
benefit
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.
As a result
Linking Words
, some
drives
Correct your spelling
drivers
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 who are on the online car-hailing platform will lose their jobs
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 lead to the unemployment rate increase.
However
Linking Words
,
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driveless
Correct your spelling
driverless
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cars
Use synonyms
 are still beneficial to individuals and
society
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. One of the pros is that
Use synonyms
driveless
Correct your spelling
driverless
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cars
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 can protect
Correct article usage
the environmrnt
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environmrnt
Correct your spelling
environment
 and emit less
poison
Replace the word
poisoning
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 gas in the air. Some autonomous
cars
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 are new-energy
form
Fix the agreement mistake
forms
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 which need to depend on
electric
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electricity
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instead
Linking Words
 of oil. Compared with those
cars
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 which depend on gasoline, they are able to exhaust much harmful gas that will hurt
people
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's health and the plants.
Therefore
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,
people
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 will have a clean and
health
Replace the word
healthy
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 environment to live
.
Change preposition
in.
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 Another pro is that use
Use synonyms
Change preposition
of driveless
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driveless
Correct your spelling
driverless
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viechles
Correct your spelling
vehicles
 enables
enhance
Add the particle
to enhance
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 the rate of death
about
Change preposition
in
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 various traffic accidents on the road.
According to
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 the data in
recently
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recent
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year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
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, there are half population because of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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drunk driving, tired driving or faults that lose their lives.
Thus
Linking Words
,
people
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 should receive the
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driveless
Correct your spelling
driverless
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cars
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are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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issued in
market
Add an article
the market
a market
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 that can help
people
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 avoid danger. In conclusion,
Use synonyms
driveless
Correct your spelling
driverless
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cars
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has
Change the verb form
have
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 many benefits to
society
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 and
people
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, inventors will try their best to invent them and contribute to
society
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. Even though
cars
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 are produced and used in
society
Use synonyms
, they might
also
Linking Words
 have some risks. So,
people
Use synonyms
 need to have the ability
of
Change preposition
to
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identifing
Correct your spelling
identify
that
Correct word choice
what
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 they can use.

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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure clarity in the introduction by clearly stating your position on the topic, and work to provide a conclusive statement that summarises your key points in the conclusion. Try to enhance the cohesiveness of your essay with clear topic sentences and well-structured paragraphs that logically flow from one to the next.
Task Achievement
Address the task requirements by examining both sides of the argument on the use of driverless cars, presenting a balanced view or a strong, clear opinion. Use relevant examples to back up your points and make sure that your conclusion matches the opinion stated in your introduction.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • autonomous vehicles
  • artificial intelligence (AI)
  • sensors
  • human error
  • traffic congestion
  • mobility
  • displacement
  • fuel efficiency
  • carbon footprint
  • pollution control
  • ethical considerations
  • legal framework
  • data privacy
  • overreliance
  • system failures
  • connectivity
  • decision-making
  • security concerns
  • economic impact
  • maintenance
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