Many people believe that women make better parents than men and that is why they have the greater role in raising children in most societies. Others claim that men are just as good as women at parenting. Write an essay expressing your point of view. Give reasons for your answers and provide relevant example and experience you might have.

Parents
are
children
's first teachers, they are the first people who impact knowledge in a
child
.
While
some people believe either men or women have a greater role in raising kids, I would argue that
both
parents
are better off raising the
children
together.
Due to
the various impacts they
both
have on the
children
. Nowadays, the mental upbringing of a
child
is really important. An individual raised by a single mother or
father
has a different mentality when compared to that of a person who was raised by
both
parents
. The collective efforts by
both
parents
are part of the element that
shape
Correct subject-verb agreement
shapes
show examples
an individual to become a law-abiding citizen of a society member.
For instance
, the presence of a
father
or a
father
figure in the life of a male
child
is invaluable. The
father
teaches a male
child
the masculine traits that men are supposed to possess. The presence of a mother is
also
as significant in the life of a female
child
as much as that of a
father
. Another important aspect of
both
parents
raising
children
is that when one is strict the other will be friendly.
Therefore
, with the combination of
both
parents
a
child
's mental state will be balanced. In conclusion,
Both
parents
Change noun form
parent's
parents'
show examples
presence is paramount in raising a
child
.
Submitted by bonuhelen on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
You should ensure that you fully address the prompt by giving a balanced view and discussing both sides of the argument before giving your own opinion. While you stated your opinion, it would be beneficial to explore the reasons why some people might think women are better parents than men to provide a more thorough discussion.
Coherence & Cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, think about the logical flow between ideas. Use cohesive devices such as 'However,' 'For example,' and 'In contrast' to make clear connections between your points. Also, be consistent in your paragraph structure, ideally with an introduction sentence, supporting sentences and a concluding sentence.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • parenting
  • nurturing
  • paternal
  • maternal
  • societal expectations
  • gender roles
  • co-parenting
  • emotional intelligence
  • child-rearing
  • caregiver
  • egalitarian
  • stereotype
  • nuclear family
  • single parent
  • shared custody
  • bonding
  • child development
  • primary caregiver
  • compassionate
  • empathetic
What to do next:
Look at other essays: