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Writing Samples /
Band 6

The table below shows the percentage use of four different fuel types to generate electricity in five Asian countries in 2005. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words. Fuel type used to generate electricity (%)

The table below shows the percentage use of four different fuel types to generate electricity in five Asian countries in 2005. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words. Fuel type used to generate electricity (%)
#percentage #four #fuel #electricity #five #asian #countries #summarise #information #features #comparisons #type
The diagram illustrates
about
Change preposition
apply
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four kinds of
fuel
generate
Wrong verb form
generating
show examples
 current
such
 as Nuclear,
Coal&lignite
Correct your spelling
coal and lignite
, Petroleum products,
Hydro&wind
Correct your spelling
hydro and wind
, and
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
 in five Asian continental nations like Malaysia, Singapore, Thailand, South Korea and Japan in 2005. The units are measured by the percentage.
Overall
, Nuclear
fuel
 was used to
generating
Wrong verb form
generate
show examples
 electricity in all these five nations as compared to other fuels. The diagram shows that
,
Remove the comma
apply
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in
Change preposition
apply
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Malaysia
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
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used more
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
coal & lignite for generating
current
Add an article
a current
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 which was 61% and Nuclear was just below
one fifth
Add a hyphen
one-fifth
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, but
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 three files
was
Change the verb form
were
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 used very low. Coal &
lignite
Correct word choice
and lignite
show examples
has
Verb problem
are
show examples
 utilised more in Singapore,
similarly
, other
fuel
Fix the agreement mistake
fuels
show examples
also
Add a missing verb
are also
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 used more which was 42% and 39% respectively. South Korea was taken electricity by using more Hydro & wind which was just below
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
half and Nuclear
fuel
 was used by 33%.
In contrast
, Thailand
had
Verb problem
did
show examples
 not
used
Wrong verb form
use
show examples
 Nuclear
fuel
 to generate electricity
while
 other
fuel
 and petroleum products
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 used more which was 42 and 36 percent respectively. Japan
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
used more Nuclear to generate current.
Submitted by reanudeepan on

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words fuel with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "diagram" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "just below" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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