In some parts of the world traditional festivals and celebrations have disappeared or are disappearing. What problems is this causing? What measures could be taken to counter this situation?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Every nation in
this
world has its own cultural festivals, and they are liable to maintain and aware of them. But nowadays; ironically, we rarely find some of these
events
. The problem that cause
this
phenomenon will be elaborated in
this
essay.
Firstly
,
this
phenomenon was happened because of less awareness of teenagers to aware with the traditional
event
. Many of them are busy with various businesses for their own future career.
As a consequence
, they do not have time to preserve the
event
.
For instance
, since advanced technology develop significantly, most of youngsters tend to choose seminars and online courses rather than involved in several cultural
events
. In the end, the one who will be impacted by
this
issue is the nation.
Therefore
, the adult who knows better about
this
issue or a
community
that concern with
this
must create unique idea to attract teenagers to love with the culture.
For example
, the cultural
community
who usually responsible with
this
event
may invite youngsters to manage, organize, and direct the
event
as a modern
event
in the earlier era. With
this
way;
thus
, they will know the traditional's independently without compulsion. Hopefully;
furthermore
, they will preserve it in the future.
Additionally
, the government should support the cultural
community
to organize their own
events
. They can start with helping on funding and various facilities to the celebration, so the
community
can create the
event
easier. In conclusion, some countries have their traditional
event
. But the fact is, some
events
are disappear because their citizens cannot preserve it because their own businesses. The cultural
community
must take an action to invite the teenagers and planting the belonging sense of the culture to them.
Moreover
, the government should support them as one of the part of the nation.
Submitted by re.li on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure there is clear paragraphing and logical sequencing of ideas throughout your essay. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea and should logically connect to the next one. Consider using cohesive devices, such as linking words and transition phrases, to enhance the flow of information and argumentation.
task achievement
Begin by addressing the task promptly. Your introduction should paraphrase the task clearly and introduce the main points of your discussion. Each paragraph in the body should discuss a unique aspect related to the task, followed by relevant examples and explanations. Finally, make sure your conclusion effectively summarizes your points and relates to the initial task.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • traditional festivals
  • heritage
  • cultural identity
  • folklore
  • cultural tourism
  • intergenerational
  • homogenization
  • commercialization
  • intangible cultural heritage
  • community engagement
  • awareness
  • revitalize
  • cultural diversity
  • educational programs
  • governmental support
  • logistical support
What to do next:
Look at other essays: