The line chart below shows the results of a survey giving the reasons why people moved to the capital city of a particular country. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The line chart below shows the results of a survey giving the reasons why people moved to the capital city of a particular country.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make 

comparisons where relevant.
The line chart illustrates
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
the survey of four causes
if
Correct your spelling
of
show examples
people who move to another place.
Overall
, it can be seen that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
employment was the most popular reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
people to go to another area,
whereas
, the least reason was because of family or
friends
and
adventure
.
To begin
with, in 2000, getting a job was the essential cause of people
moved
Wrong verb form
moving
show examples
to
city
Add an article
the city
show examples
, it started
roughly
Change preposition
at roughly
show examples
60,000
percentage
Replace the word
per cent
show examples
,
then
it rose dramatically
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
ten years ahead about 90,000,
although
it dipped slightly
in
Change the preposition
at
show examples
the end of the year roughly 88,000.
Whereas
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
studying was the second
placed
Replace the word
place
show examples
, it jumped up all the entire years, which started approximately 25,000 to 88,000 in 2000 to 2015.
Furthermore
, the two
last
reasons were
due to
family or
friends
and
adventure
,
while
the
adventure
was the
most
Change the adjective
apply
show examples
least percentage than
friends
and
adventure
. The
adventure
was
increasing stabilize
Wrong verb form
increased stabilised
show examples
(10,000 to 11,000) for the entire years,
besides
family or
friends
reason went up slowly where about 11,000 to 21,000 between 2000 and 2015.
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "whereas".
Vocabulary: Replace the words friends, adventure with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "move" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "roughly" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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