In some countries, there have been schemes to encourage older professional people to retrain as school teachers. Do you feel that this is likely to have beneficial effects on education? Support your point of view with reasons and/or examples from your own experience.

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Nowadays, there is a debate on curriculums and who is going to teach it. A diverse range of countries is fostering elderly experts to educate youths in education centres

as a result

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of, the shortage of

teachers

Use synonyms

in these countries. I have a balanced opinion on

this

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statement.In

this

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essay, I will elaborate on my view. On the one hand, young

teachers

Use synonyms

are from a nearby generation. They can transfer the data in an effortless way. They have the same modern language

instead

Linking Words

of the old-fashioned language from older

teachers

Use synonyms

Moreover

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, the middle age

teachers

Use synonyms

are vibrant and active. They will not be exhausted over time. They are energetic and can learn new technology swiftly.

Thus

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, they can utilize it during semesters. One of the sparked examples is Qatar. The country started to import young

teachers

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from neighbouring countries. They believe that

this

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method can enhance the education system.

On the other hand

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, old-age

teachers

Use synonyms

are more experts. They have taught for a long period. They would love to deliver

this

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experience to their descendants.

In addition

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, they can handle the students , especially the less-behaved students. They are more aware of

this

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type of student.

For instance

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, In Egypt, they are hiring overqualified

teachers

Use synonyms

in schools in the rural area. The pupils in these regions are misbehaved and need to be controlled. In conclusion, there will be a debate on

this

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argument.

However

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, It will depend on the area that the

teachers

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will work in. The type of

teachers

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and the years of the working. These all play a crucial role in opting for

teachers

Use synonyms

mohannadsmeFri Aug 02 2024

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Coherence and Cohesion

Your essay has a logical structure, but the ideas sometimes feel disconnected. Try to ensure that each paragraph flows smoothly into the next. Using more cohesive devices such as 'furthermore' or 'in addition' could help enhance the flow.

Task Achievement

The introduction presents the topic and your stance, but it could be clearer. Try to clearly state your position regarding whether the scheme to retrain older professional people as school teachers is beneficial or not. This will help the reader understand your argument right from the beginning.

Task Achievement

You have provided relevant examples which support your points well. However, ensure that every argument is thoroughly explained and connected to your main point. Some ideas, such as the experience of old-age teachers, are not fully elaborated.

Coherence and Cohesion

You have included an introduction and a conclusion, which helps in providing a complete and balanced analysis of the topic.

Task Achievement

The examples given, such as the situation in Qatar and Egypt, add specificity and relevance to your arguments. This helps to make your essay more convincing.

Task Achievement

You have clearly attempted to discuss both sides of the argument, presenting a balanced view. This is an important aspect of a well-rounded essay.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

266 words

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In some countries, there have been schemes to encourage older professional people to retrain as school teachers. Do you feel that this is likely to have beneficial effects on education? Support your point of view with reasons and/or examples from your own experience.

At the present time the population of some countries including a relatively large number of young adults compared with the number of older people do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages

Countries are becoming more and more similliar because are able to by the same products anywhere in the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Many parents complain that computer games have no value to their chuldren’s Study. On the contrary , those online games have produced a lot of negative effect on their mental and physical development. What is your opinion

Some are of the opinion that people are naturally born as good leaders while others feel that leadership skills can be learned Discuss both views and give your own opinion.