IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the annual pay (thousands of US dollars) for doctors and other workers in seven countries in 2004.

The chart below shows the annual pay (thousands of US dollars) for doctors and other workers in seven countries in 2004.
A glance at a bar graph provided reveals the number of
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
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average
Change preposition
of average
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 incomes for other occupations and
doctors
Use synonyms
, measured in
thousand
Correct your spelling
thousands
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 of US dollars, in 2004.
Overall
Linking Words
, the ones
of
Change preposition
in
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 the US took up the most remarkable proportion of both sections mentioned. In terms of yearly payments for other vocations, the US was the nation which paid for the employees with the highest salary range with more than 40, followed narrowly by the figure of Switzerland with exactly 4.
Whereas
Linking Words
, inhabitants came from France and Finland whose earnings constituted
both
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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merely 20.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the other countries namely Italy,
Czech
Correct article usage
the Czech
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 Republic and Germany all paid for those work
the
Change preposition
with the
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 lowest breakdown with absolutely 20. Regarding the number of salaries for the
doctors
Use synonyms
, The US was the only nation which could maintain its crown at the most surprising figure with 120. At the opposite end of
Correct article usage
the scales
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scales
Fix the agreement mistake
scale
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, Finnish
doctors
Use synonyms
 only received slightly higher than 40 which was the lowest number compared to the others.
Whereas
Linking Words
, remaining countries namely Switzerland, France, Czech Republic, Germany and Italy were the nations which paid for the
doctors
Use synonyms
 in
group
Fix the agreement mistake
groups
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 of 60 to 70.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "whereas".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words doctors with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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